Shoudl I tell my girlfriend I've had a HT?

[Danny1976]

Hi!

 

I need you advice on something that I have to consider pretty soon. I have done 2 hair transplants with dr Hasson with excellent results, I have virtually gone from a NW 4 to a NW 1. Since 7 months, I have dated a great girl that is a bit younger than me, and it's getting pretty serious and we're talking about moving in together. The problem is that she doesn't know that I've had hair transplants. Sometime she's talked about how nice she thinks my hair looks, and how unusual it is to have that good hair at my age (I am 36 and she is 27). She has seen some old pictures, and she has commented that I look much better now than before , but I'm not sure that she realizes that the hair is the difference. On March 1st I will do a small FUE to fix my temple points, and that is hopefully the last procedure I will ever do. Should I tell my girlfriend about this? Won't it seem strange that I go away for 2 weeks, and then come back with a shaved head?

 

Somehow I realise that I have to tell her eventually, but I'm afraid that she will think I am superficial and that it will change the way she thinks about me. What would you have done in my place? How have you solved similar problems in your lives?

 

/Danny

[StaggerLee123]

Of course you should if you want an honest relationship.

[Cant decide]

I think you should tell her. If she is a quality girl, she will totally support you and she will find out eventually and want to know why you would not trust her enough to tell her somthing that personal.

 

It is so funny how people even when looking at a picture of us when we had much much less hair, they still dont realize anything has been done. It is astonishing to me. I see that in my case all the time.

[Yiddo]

If you come back with a shaved head wont she wonder where the scar came from on the back of your head. Also where are you going to say you have been for 2 weeks ? She might think your playing away..lol

[1978matt]

I reckon tell her. The chances are she will be facinated more than anything, especially as she has no idea.

[OtherSyde]

If you come back with a shaved head wont she wonder where the scar came from on the back of your head. Also where are you going to say you have been for 2 weeks ? She might think your playing away..lol

 

What scar? He's getting FUE, not FUT.

 

I'm pretty much honest with anyone that asks; I'm weird like that I guess, a very active proponent of self improvement by any means available. But even if you don't want the world knowing, it would be good to have an honest relationship. My wife is perfectly happy that I get HT's, since it guarantees her that she'll never be married to a bald guy. It also essentially makes it acceptable for her to get something that she might want, like say, some Smart-Lipo after childbirth, or a breast lift. Point those things out when you tell her.

 

A man (or woman) born beautiful is like a stupid child with a big daddy's-money trust fund who lives the posh life, not knowing what they have and wasting it early on, and becoming lazy and spoiled, unprepared to weather the brutal storm of aging that lies ahead.

 

A person with a self-made image, who knows from a younger age how to maintain their attractiveness and beauty, what has to be done, and how to do it the most effective and sustainable possible way is the best kind to be with; To borrow the old 1980's computer acronym, WYSIWYG: What You See Is What You Get. No deception. This is pretty much how your hair will look 20-30 years from now, with a few touch-ups in between.

 

When you're sitting at the black-jack table of Life, you do not gamble. You count cards and play for the win.

[Yiddo]

I thought he said he already had 2 HT with Dr Hasson. He does FUT, hence there being a scar !

[OtherSyde]

I thought he said he already had 2 HT with Dr Hasson. He does FUT, hence there being a scar !

 

Oh H&W doesn't do FUE..? I did not know that. Yeah then there's probably already a scar there, I just thought you meant he would show up at home 2 weeks later with a big nasty new scar. Yeah she might notice the old scar too, though, if his head was shaved.

[Cant decide]

 

A man (or woman) born beautiful is like a stupid child with a big daddy's-money trust fund who lives the posh life, not knowing what they have and wasting it early on, and becoming lazy and spoiled, unprepared to weather the brutal storm of aging that lies ahead.

 

A person with a self-made image, who knows from a younger age how to maintain their attractiveness and beauty, what has to be done, and how to do it the most effective and sustainable possible way is the best kind to be with; To borrow the old 1980's computer acronym, WYSIWYG: What You See Is What You Get. No deception. This is pretty much how your hair will look 20-30 years from now, with a few touch-ups in between .

 

This post is pure gold!!!

[GBU]

Your surgery is your business . I would give her an honest answer if she asks but otherwise I would keep it to myself .

[Bobilero]

Keep it to yourself. If things go tits up with her she will use it against you and blab it around.

 

You could mention the new one and say its your first. Why feel the need to mention the others, their done now and dont matter now.

[StaggerLee123]

This post is pure gold!!!

 

Lol

[MAGNUMpi]

I once had this girlfriend/friend who was really shocked when I said I was considering a HT. Its funny because she had a boob job and was anything but natural. She said she didn't want to imagine me being so vain.

It's like when a guy has a 6 pack. Most girls don't want to know that he did 1000 sit ups before bed each night for the last year and stared into the mirror a billion times. They just want to think he looks good naturally with some rainbow-unicorn-magic somehow.

It's a double standard but I would think a bit if you are unsure about telling her. It could turn her off.....or she'll be 100% fine with it, but if you ever break up she might mention it to others at some point, either on purpose or just in passing.

Good luck.

Let us know what happens if you do tell her.

[OtherSyde]

OK yeah, I hadn't thought of her using it against you if you break up, but that only matters if you're going to be ashamed of it.

[Spanker]

Do the two of you run in the same circles? For, instance, I have my old friends and she has hers. I wouldn't have to talk to people she told if we went south, so no big deal.

 

I would tell her. First, she'll be blown away, and second, if she is worth keeping, it will not matter to her.

[Bill - Seemiller]

Originally Posted by OtherSyde

A man (or woman) born beautiful is like a stupid child with a big daddy's-money trust fund who lives the posh life, not knowing what they have and wasting it early on, and becoming lazy and spoiled, unprepared to weather the brutal storm of aging that lies ahead.

 

A person with a self-made image, who knows from a younger age how to maintain their attractiveness and beauty, what has to be done, and how to do it the most effective and sustainable possible way is the best kind to be with; To borrow the old 1980's computer acronym, WYSIWYG: What You See Is What You Get. No deception. This is pretty much how your hair will look 20-30 years from now, with a few touch-ups in between .

 

This post is pure gold!!!

 

I couldn't agree more.

 

In my opinion, honesty is always the best policy. For many, hair transplantation has changed lives and if this is true of you, it's become an important part of your life.

 

While many women may not be able to identify with hair loss concerns, most women are insecure about something (weight, height, breast size, waist size, buttocks, etc.).

 

Thus, if you're girlfriend is honest and genuine, she can identify with your former insecurities and respect that you've found a solution to remedy them.

 

Good luck!

 

Bill

[Bill - Seemiller]

P.S. I haven't met a person yet (male or female) who wasn't intrigued and impressed by the fact that I've surgically restored my hair. I think most people are mostly interested in the fact that today's hair restoration surgery is so natural looking.

[Yiddo]

Keep it to yourself. If things go tits up with her she will use it against you and blab it around.

 

You could mention the new one and say its your first. Why feel the need to mention the others, their done now and dont matter now.

 

I agree. If your happy for other people to know then tell her. If you dont want anybody else to ever know dont tell her.

Never underestimate what a blabber mouth a women can be. She might only tell someone in a nice way, but she will tell someone, its in their nature.

My missus has already told her best mate that im thinking of having one later in the year. Ive not even had it yet and she's opened her fcuking gob.

 

As bobilero says, if things go tits up she may tell everyone and embarass you, Woman can turn like the wind. Once you have told her, thats it, no going back !!

[Danny1976]

We don't run in the same circles, and live in 2 different cities, som if we'd break up we don't really have any common friends. I realize that I probably have to tell her, some of my relatives already know, and it would be a problem if anyone of them by accident would mention it in front of her. Probably she'd wonder shy I haven't told her myself. It'll also probably be hard to hide the HT.

[Bill - Seemiller]

It's unfortunate that so many people still live in fear of sharing their hair restoration experience with others. People with weight issues publicly join gyms, start workout programs and openly share their diet plan with others. Why should hair loss and hair restoration be any different?

 

In my opinion, too many hair loss sufferers live in fear of what others might think if they openly share their concern and desire to restore their hair. Yet, I've found that most people are very understanding and supportive to those who openly express themselves.

 

In my opinion, honesty is the best policy. And in most cases, I think being so open about a personal struggle and the steps you've taken to resolve them can make any relationship (romantic or otherwise) stronger.

 

Best wishes,

 

Bill

[Cant decide]

Well said Bill!!

[Eman]

You have had surgery and didn't tell her, which is fine. But if you are going into another procedure, albeit less invasive than FUT, and you want to maintain honesty and transparency in the relationship, I would tell her.

 

She would be plenty upset for you not "trusting" her or being honest with her about what you are doing, especially when you are together and possibly a future together.

 

I told my girlfriend at the time I was going in for my HT and she turned out to be super supportive. Was I worried she would tell others if we broke up, no. But if she did, so what?! I had an amazing job done and I am super happy with my results (even 4.5 years later!)

 

My thought is, if someone inquires...tell them. They will be intrigued and you are being honest. It doesn't make you any less of a man to be somewhat vain. We care about our looks just as women do.

[james84]

I can relate to this, i have been with my girlfriend for ten years.

 

she has been with me from the days i had a full head of hair until now, has hairloss changed her opinion of me?? No!! And because of this i know she loves me for who i am and this makes me realise my love for her and the kind of girl i have been with for the past ten years.

 

If anything hairloss has made our relationship stronger if possible.

 

Now should you tell your girfriend.....Yes but only when you feel ready, women have boob jobs, liposuction etc etc....

 

I told my Girlfriend last year i were considering a hair transplant after researching for years. Her response was "if it makes you happy, then that makes me happy"

 

Good luck with whatever you decide, but after i told her....big relieve:D

 

Regards.

[ratt57]

Definitely tell her. You had some hair moved from the back of your head to the top, that's basically it. I've encountered some strange reactions after I had my HT that surprised me - mostly from women who didn't feel men should be concerned about their appearance (but it's okay if they are) and other bald men - but now that it's grown out they've accepted it and a lot of people are saying they like it. As far as "using it against you," how? By telling people you had a hair transplant? Not a very big weapon...

[antony]

I agree with GBU. If she asks then by all means tell her, otherwise after the surgery it is as it was before with a little bit of rearranged hair. Forget about it and just enjoy the result, carry on.