after 10 years of saving for an ht and im not a good candidate

[apgomez85]

Okay so I took pictures to see what it looks like in the sun. You should be able to tell now why I wasn't a good candidate for a transplant. I could also tell that this buzzcut is not working . I think the lighting in the house made it look better than it actually is. I will try shorter I suppose.

[tacolinowest]

I see it but mine looks the same....

[apgomez85]

I don't know what to tell ya. I'll make sure they are not trying to just get your money. Really ask them what you expect to get and what they think you can get. The consultant told me that he had one guy visit him that got a ht when he shouldn't have and it ruined his life. Your situation may be different because I was reading your thread and you mention that your hair was like this since you were young. Mine wasn't. I started thinning on top when I was young and had thick hair in my donor area. Over that past few years it started thinning out.

[Calgacus]

Dude, you look cool as f**k with the buzzcut. I wish I could pull that off.

 

Unfortunately for me, I have a Herman Munster head.

[apgomez85]

Thanks. But the buzz doesnt look that great in the sun. Will have to go shorter. Hopefully it works for me.

[Spanker]

1. I think you should cut it much shorter. Like a 1mm.

2. You do not look like a terrible candidate to me, hmm.

[hairshopeing]

Agreed, shave it right down and grow ur stubble out to the same or slightly longer, you suit a shaved head, seriously, you've got the right shaped head and skin colouring!!! Shave it and you'll be surprised!!! Good luck!!

[apgomez85]

If you look at the pics when I'm in the sun you can see how the diffuse hair loss makes me a bad candidate.

 

I don't know about completely shaved yet. I really hope I can get a good looking stubble. I really dug myself into a hole wearing a hat all the time around people. I mean ALL the time. No one has seen me without a hat for years. I wish I would of just started buzzing it down in the beginning and just let it be.

 

Thanks for all the support. It really has been helping. I will keep working on my confidence.

[KO]

Maybe facial hair fue to create a stubble is an option? You have thick facial hair...

[apgomez85]

i'd rather not take a financial risk like that. plus, it will take a lot because it's diffused all over.

[Spanker]

Go for it. And remember to try it for 30 days. It will grow on you and your peace of mind will make you much happier. Maybe start at a 2 blade. That is probably the highest buzz you will get away with. What you are looking for is less contrast and you hair loss will be less noticeable. Don't worry about the hat thing. You will be shocked how little other people think about your hair.

[KO]

Don't give up taking fin though. Just keep your follicles alive, even if you put them on life support! Perhaps there is a chance that one of these experimental treatments work, and it will be better if you still have some hair.

[apgomez85]

Yeah I was thinking the same thing. I'll stay on fin just in case.

[Davis91]

I just read this thread.

 

Listen pal, I've been all over the world and am always looking at heads and hair. I guarantee you that you look very good even with a self-cut-half-attempt at a buzz. Go to a pro and learn to use the clippers and get it buzzed down. Experiment with facial hair length and styles Start with the full beard and start trimming and making styles. Have fun with it.

 

Combined with working out and good diet you are almost home. I wouldn't go for a transplant even if you were a good candidate---you have the goods to get by in life very well with a short hair cut/buzz. Not everyone can due to head shape. So life did give you something, and now YOU have to take the next step--find your perspective, confidence, and hopefully smile---cause even if you have a hair transplant that looks great, if you have a lack of confidence or are frowning/negative, it will turn people away. I'm not saying you have to be happy all the time, just long enough to make the impression on the people you want to! Keep us updated on the styles....

[apgomez85]

Thanks for the kind words. I will go to a pro and see what they can do with my head. I'm warming up to the buzzed look. I'm not sure about complete shaven because even though it might look good, I don't like the up keep of keeping it clean shaven.

 

I will keep you guys posted on my progress. I have a plan to hopefully be good to go around christmas time. It's my favorite time of the year and gives me enough time to get in good shape, find a style and build my confidence with my head. I know it's a bit of a long time from now, but I always set myself a long goal plan to make sure it gets done right. I'm planning on getting lasik too. My sisters say it's one of the best financial decisions they ever made.

 

I never thought of myself of having the "tough guy look" but with a beard and shaven/buzzed head I don't think I have a choice. It's hard for me to imagine because I'm actually very timid.

[SamSpade]

rock the shaved look man. {or try a hair system, i don't know anyone with them but i know there are some out there that some people swear by them.} But in my opinion i'd go with the shaved look, much less hassle and you could move on with your life. I think it's more than tough guys who can pull off shaved look. I know a lot of artists and musicians who pull it off just fine and get a lot lady attention without problems.

[SamSpade]

 

 

 

 

[apgomez85]

I don't like to compare celebrities because they have their fame to backup their success with women. And they have great facial features for a shaved look too which i dont believe i have.

[socates123]

ok

[SamSpade]

 

I don't like to compare celebrities because they have their fame to backup their success with women.

Fair enough, though that logic doesn't quite hold up since there's far more women who are dating/married to non-famous men than famous men.

[Davis91]

Dude,

 

You do have the facial features to pull it off. Stop poo-pooing it. You may need a little tough love right here. Don't set a long term goal for X-mas. You are good to go RIGHT NOW. You have been putting this off for seven years and being a hermit. No more naysaying--in your case this is strictly a confidence issue. Work out, get in better shape, eat better--all that is good, but do it for yourself to feel better about the total package and help get a smile on your face. Forget the hair--you have a good plan, go to a pro, have fun with the buzz down, and enjoy life--we all are saying it--you have the head/look to pull off what many of us can't. Well done on that, and rock the look for all of us that wish we could!

[Spanker]

I don't like to compare celebrities because they have their fame to backup their success with women. And they have great facial features for a shaved look too which i dont believe i have.

 

 

You do have the facial features, which include a nice jaw line and nice beard. You are not fat and do not look soft. You have a lot more going on for you than the average person. It is your confidence and attitude that will hurt you with the ladies.

 

You seem to have made a decision to not get an HT. Get up, go shave that melon, just man up, then keep shaving it or buzzing (a real buzz). You are a lucky one that can put hair behind you. You have all of the features to do so, at least externally.

 

To be blunt, and I am trying to help you here, your biggest problem seems to be you, not your hair or your looks. Whatever you have to do to find your confidence, you should not wait. New clothes, hit the gym, whatever it takes, but with your confidence level where it is right now, its not going to work for you. An ugly guy with confidence and a tiny bit of swag can swing way more ladies than a good looking fit guy like you that is down and won't "own" his look. The ladies just don't dig that.

 

I'm not exceptional in looks by any means, average to just above average, but I get attention for my attitude, confidence, intelligence, and sense of humor. Focus on those things and not your hair, and stop waiting to do it. Good luck.

Edited May 1, 2013 by Spanker

[apgomez85]

You guys are right. My confidence is the issue here. I am trying really hard to gain it. Thats why I have a long term plan. I just know myself and it will take me a while to build up to it. The reason it will be a while is I plan on getting in shape by xmas and getting my look together along with my attitude towards myself. I figure six months and I can get myself in a good spot in all areas. If I try to go out now, I will be way out of my comfort zone and it will show. I'm trying to minimize that. I know my self-esteem is bad and I'm working on it because, like you said and I've heard many times, confidence is what matters.

[SamSpade]

ApGomez - After reading through your post, I'd also recommend therapy as another consideration. In my opinion, everyone needs some therapy and getting a lot of this out to a trained professional could help significantly. There's emmense freedom in opening up to someone completely unbiased and unconnected to anyone in your life, completely trained and committed to you. My wife is a therapist so I'm naturally biased and a big believer in this. She also sees a therapist as well. There's a huge stigma in our culture away from therapy/counseling and it's too bad. We break our foot and we go to the doctor, but if we have emotional problems we're supposed to figure it out on our own. It's a sad predicament especially for men.

 

I personally know the emotional damage hairloss has and continues to cause even after hair transplant surgery. I also have a close friend who had a roommate who ended his life last year, and it was after a successful hair transplant. I'm not presuming I know your head space or that your suicidal, but it goes to show that we end up believing we only need to beat our worse physical enemy, we can go without fixing our deeper emotional and therapeutic issues which are the root of continued pain.

[apgomez85]

Maybe....therapy costs a lot though. If all else fails, I'll look into it.