emotional battle with this

[azazelgs]

firstly, sorry for this kind of depressing post but i'm really desperate for some help.

 

I'm 23, NW 3. All the men in my family are basically now NW 5-6, so i know where i'm gonna end up. The thing is I'm really starting to loose my pschological health because of this. Everytime I saw myself into mirror all I can think of that this can't be me. I can't go out, I can't sleep, I can't hang out with my friends because I feel like I have something missing, like sort of defficency.I can't even talk to a girl,I have nothing left in my self confidence,I feel like I'm gonna die all by myself , even at this age(by the way, I was really very social and considered goodlooking guy with extreme ego when I was in high school)At the street or when I'm talking with someone else, I feel paranoid that everyone is constantly looking at me,my hair. Some days it becomes so bad that I got into a panic attack and nerve crysis that I can't go out(agoraphobia I guess)

 

I constantly look at my reflection in various occasions, in some I see my self good and that day goes well with me, if I don't see any other reflections that shows otherwise. Photos on my passport or ID are from 3 years ago so when I see one of them I feel like crying because there are no signs of hair loss on those days. Some peole around me always say this will pass , but only think I certainly know is my baldness will get worse, which I can't even imagine what I'm gonna feel when I'll be NW6.by the way , I started prophecia 3 months ago,seems like it slowed down the loss but I have no problem in crown area.

 

I do respect all of you in this forum that had HT and happy with their results, evethough I'm in this site for like 6 months I'm still confused about the idea. It sucks to be at my age and at my hair loss because it feels like there's nothing you can do about it. I'm too young to have a HT, that's the fact. And eventhough I'd do it, I will look like a freak in 2-3 years with losing more of my native hair. But also the main problem is i feel like ?±'m too young to go through such a thing.I'm just a young guy, but now i feel like im 40 on the inside.

So, I feel like I'm stuck really and have no one to talk to about this. Maybe some of you will share your thoughts about this and help me go through this phase. I'll really apreciate some advices and maybe some experiences that are similar to mine.

[Bill - Seemiller]

azazelgs,

 

I know how difficult hair loss can be, especially at such a young age. Male pattern baldness is not age discriminatory and though rarer, it can hit people in their teens. For years I wore a hat in public to mask my baldness and shame from the world. And while it's normal to care about what we look like, I firmly believe that our confidence and sense of self worth should come from within. I'm realizing this more and more as I get older. The truth is, one day (hair or not), we will all be old, wrinkly, and gravity will be our enemies. If all we have to hold onto is our looks, we're in for a huge disappointment.

 

My great grandfather was completely bald by the time he was 18. But he was one heck of a good guy and a role model for the masses. He found himself a beautiful wife, fought in both world wars and became a military hero. He lived a great life and was well respected by his family, friends, and a great multitude he came into contact with throughout his life. Though having hair is nice, it's who you are that makes the man, not how much hair you have.

 

Propecia (finasteride) and Rogaine (minoxidil) are your best bets to help you maintain the hair you have at this point. While you may not regrow any new hair, it may help sustain what you have in order to prepare for the possibility of having a hair transplant when you're older.

 

If you want my honest opinion, shave your head, consider growing a goatee and focus your energy on hitting the gym and getting pumped. Though nobody likes hair loss, the shaved head look is in and quite popular with the ladies. You'll also find that there are plenty of women attracted much more to a confident and sensitive guy, with a good sense of humor than whether or not he has hair. Being fit helps too :-).

 

Hang in there my friend. I sent you my phone number via private message. If you'd like someone to talk to who can relate, give me a hollar!

 

Best wishes,

 

Bill

[splitting hairs]

Hi, I'm 23 aswell, and like you I'm a Norwood 3 but my crown is OK. My family history is norwood 6.

 

Hair loss at a young age sucks, there's no doubt about that. I got on Propecia 18 months ago at 22. My hairloss has stopped for now.

 

Give the propecia time. It will probably slow down your loss dramatically.

 

Bill has given you good advice there but for me personally, I didn't want the shaved head look, and i don't think I could embrace baldness - i probaly couldn't handle all the comments.

 

Try and find ways to style your hair, use wax - not gel, try using nanogen fibres - a style thats good for receeders is the faux hawk - give it a go. I did that about a year ago and my self confidence grew.

 

For now, this is how i'm getting by and safe in the knowledge that in 3-4years i'm going to Dr Hasson in Vancouver to get my frontal third transplanted, I know that everyting will work out for the best. Plus you don't have to worry about becoming a norwood 6. Look at hasson and wongs gallery - they are the only clinic to consistently restore a good head of hair to such patients.

 

Don't get me wrong, I still have lapses from time to time where i want a transplant, but thats to be expected.

 

Good luck, if you want to ask anything, PM me.

[Bleachcola12]

AZ,

 

I am in the exact position you are. And when you said, "When I look at my passport photo or license it shows me with no hairloss..." I have a licesne picture taken in 2005 where there is no hairloss, and everytime i look at it it kinda gets me down. The only advice I can really offer is what I do is simply keep grinding. Keep chasing after your dreams. You have to go to work or class and you cant find your hat because its time to go already, what do you do? GO, just keep grinding and keep going. This loss will be temporary and then you will get the HT. So remember my friend, this hairloss is not forever! I would say your a couple of years from a transplant. So just wait! 2 years isnt a long time

[why oh why]

i know exactly how you feel, i'm 25, i'll be 26 in august. Like you i found this forum when i was 23 (june 2007)... actually i think i was trollin for a long time before that (i got on propecia that january, i'm not sure if it was cause of here or not... the rogaine was though haha). Bill is the best at giving the advice, he knows his facts, that's for sure.

 

as far as the depressing angles of the loss, the bit of advice i can give is this: humans by nature project the extreme of what they feel on themselves (hence skinny girls always thinking they're fat). This happens in huge amounts with all of us balding guys. What we think is the end of the world is usually not THAT much. for example in 2006 i decided to shave my head and be done with it (i was just turned 22, actually i did it cause shamrock lost to rich franklin, i bet myself if franklin won, i'd shave it, cause i hate rich franklin... such a tool... but i digress).

 

about a year ago (late 2008) i decided to give my hair one last shot (i've still been losing a slightly good amount on prop/rogaine... but i do feel it's helped). while my hair is slightly thin in the back while grown out, it's not near as noticeable to others as i had always feared it would be a few years ago. (i just make sure not to get it wet in the rain hahaha)

 

now while the front has receded a bit and the back is thin, i still look like i have a long ways to go till i look "old and bald", all i can do is kick myself for shaving it when i did and not enjoying what i had left. haha i should have waited to do that until about a year or two from now when it's actually noticable with the close crop cut hahahaha

 

moral of the story: what you may be taking as horrible (and i don't doubt you are, i feel the same way about my hairloss, i've just had a few more years of getting wiser about my outlook) others probably don't even care, or better yet, even notice.

 

sure one or two might say something, but it's just cause they're insecure about themselves. for example, the ONLY person ever to mention my loss up top was this douche "friend" of mine (really we just traveled in the same circles and he was always annoying and jealous that i got WAYYYY better looking girls than him, and was better at sports) and the only reason he could notice was cause we were in the pool playing volleyball, and my hair of course was wet.

 

but for you, your loss is up front, i wouldn't even worry about it.

 

thana would be a good one to talk to as well about frontal loss.

[azazelgs]

thank you very much everyone for your sincere replies.

 

why o why,

 

the thing you said about skinny girls is i think my main problem. I know i lost a lot of hair but everytime I see someone from highschool that i haven't seen for a while (like 2-3 years) say "you haven't changed a bit." i never got any words like "bald" or "balding" , and i havent really felt like it 2-3 months ago. But I don't know what happened ,suddenly i became into this inconfident loser guy that i don't wanna spend the rest of my life with.

 

Bleachcola12,

 

Thank you for the courage but eventhough this is a hair "transplant" web site , my major concern is about the "confidence" and ego. I really don't want to think all the time about my hair and get my old self confidence back , thats all. I've seen some magnificent and life changing results in this site , i've learned A LOT from this forum and for me the first thing i learned is that having a bad HT is worse than being bald. That's the risk i really don't want to take. Also since im 23 and the days when i was NW0 was not so far, my expectations will be very high and no HT will fulfill this. Thus I'm very lucky to have the financial capabilities to go anywhere to have the operation done but as i said my main concern is about my self confidence.

 

The point is, I wanna look into mirror and say "you look good". I believe everything comes from inside and if you can reflect your self confidence to outside, the rest will come up( i mean about girls of course ) But thats the part i'm failing and I need to get that back and i really like opinions and thoughts to help me overcome this.

[Marvin]

I know exactly what you mean about your ID photo.

 

My passport photo shows a full head of hair. Right now, I am somewhere between NW2 and NW3, so I can still sort of look like I have a full head of hair (at least when my hair is short). Once I progress past NW3, I am going to "lose" my passport and get a new one. I'll cut my hair really short for it, so I'll look as bald as possible for it. That way, for a few years at least, I'll be able to say "at least I look better than in my ID photo"

[Marvin]

I will look like a freak in 2-3 years with losing more of my native hair.

 

I know how this feels too.

 

One of my professors in college looked a lot like me; that is, same height, same face shape, etc. The difference was, he was a NW5.75 or so.

 

It used to make me depressed to look at him, because I know that one day I'll look just like him. But, on the other side, it didn't stop him from being very successful in his field.

[why oh why]

i've been coming to realize that it's my main problem with all this as well. at least the aspect of my age. It's always been more of a "why so early?" rather than a "why me?" question for myself. I knew long ago it would happen. i dealt with that. however, now that it's full steam ahead my main thought is "why can't this amount of loss happen when i'm 35 and married... not 25 and still lookin around?????"

 

but the crux of it is, i knew i would be pretty good and bald by the time i was 35, so the fact that i'm "slightly thin lookin" up top is more just what i guess is the natural progression for me towards 35 and bald hahaha. it takes time for nature to gradually tear your heart out, you know?

 

here however is how i've come to cope with it:

 

like i said, and you acknowledged, we project the worst extremes into situations like this (balding, getting fat, whatever...). if it's not what it used to be, it's never going to be good enough, or so we think. The bright side is that you STILL have time with what you do have left. on top of that, we live in an age where there's a pill/foam for that (literally and figuratively). you're doing what you can. that's all you need to know.

 

i know it's hard, but try not to let it wreck your confidence, if i could i'd punch my two/three year ago self in the mouth for thinkin that my life was over cause I could tell i was thinning, nobody else could when i was out(or in... EVEN with my head buzzed). even now that they probably CAN tell, i'm 25 almost 26... that's nature, i'm still as badass as i was 5/6 years ago. i'd much rather be balding me then some of the dumb, out of work, morons who i went to HS with. or better yet our cheerleader who turned stripper, fat, and now has 2 kids from she doesn't know who.

 

I would love to go back in time and say "knock it the F off! you're still the badass, quick talker that you ALWAYS were" but i can't. i can just tell YOU, and others like us, that confidence makes the man, not the hair.

 

we DO make things worse than they are, and it snowballs and turns into horrible quicksand all at once. what you might think is damaging, might just make that SMOKIN hot 22 year old chick think you look like just what she's lookin for (a little older, a little wiser), not some dumb 22 year old KID that "wants to rage" and usually hits on her.

 

if you do feel someone "judging" you cause of your receding, power through with confidence that you ARE the same badass dude you always were, just now... you're older and know what you're doing.

 

lastly,

 

there IS life when it's gone, and i would definitely be ok with being jason statham or MANY other good lookin bald dudes that are out there.

[why oh why]

ohhhhh ps...

 

as for ID photos ... my goal is to keep the one from when i'm 18 as LONG as i can.

 

i wanna be 40/bald and have the same picture that was taken on that 18th bday haha

 

in texas (as i'm sure is the same for most states) they let you renew your DL online so hopefully i can keep getting it with that pic on it.

[splitting hairs]

azazelgs,

 

Be aware that from looking at the patient websites, there are quite a few guys who have been taking propecia since their early twenties, and now are in their mid-late thirties and still have a significant amount of hair.

 

That bodes well for all of us, and if you do decide to go down the transplant route, it will obviously help a lot.

 

Whenever I feel down about hair loss - I think what it must have been like for my dad - no propecia, no rogaine, no good transplants - it was a case of wear a wig or live with it.

 

So there isn't a cure for baldness - but the drugs we have do a hell of a lot and the top clinics do amazing transplants. So the options are there, we're lucky. So don't fear this.

 

Good luck.

[B+ve]

azazelgs,

 

I can completely relate to what you are going through.I am 22 and my confidence has taken a beating because of hairloss.The ego inside me has completely dissapeared.In just a couple of months time the feeling that when u are walking down the street and nobody even notices u suddenly vanishes is really upsetting.I just feel invisible to the girls all of a sudden.My long time gf dumped me some moths back back because i was losing hair.For some people the hair really reflects on the face n i was probably 1 amongst them.My hair made me look good and now it makes me look ugly.All of a sudden my wavy thick hair started miniaturising very badly and it was like a head full of of really ugly looking shapeless curly hair.My hairline started receding.This is when i avoided meeting my gf for weeks making some excuse.And the day i finally did she came towards me from some distance with all smiles but when she took a good look at me i could notice the smile suddenly vanished and she look surprised.She told me that i was looking weird.i could clearly see that she was feeling embarrassed to introduce me to her batchmates as her bf.The following day she dumped me.I dont really blame her for anything,She was extremely goodlooking and she did deserve some1 who looked really good.In your early tweenties its not all about the person from within,looks do matter!!,so i dont really blame her.I just felt like a loser alltogeter.It was not because of my breakup, it was because i felt life was changing.It was not the same.The worst part being there is no history of hairloss in my family.I dont know why this is happening to me

 

I have been on the big there i.e finastride,minoxidil and nizoral for 4 months and it has been working excellently well for my crown.It has even reversed my miniaturised hair to a great extent.I will be considering a hair transplant in the future.

 

Hang in there man.There are meds which are working and a possible hair transplent in the future to restore your hair.Just hope for the best.Think positive.B+v2

[Bleachcola12]

Originally posted by B+ve:

azazelgs,

 

I can completely relate to what you are going through.I am 22 and my confidence has taken a beating because of hairloss.The ego inside me has completely dissapeared.In just a couple of months time the feeling that when u are walking down the street and nobody even notices u suddenly vanishes is really upsetting.I just feel invisible to the girls all of a sudden.My long time gf dumped me some moths back back because i was losing hair.For some people the hair really reflects on the face n i was probably 1 amongst them.My hair made me look good and now it makes me look ugly.All of a sudden my wavy thick hair started miniaturising very badly and it was like a head full of of really ugly looking shapeless curly hair.My hairline started receding.This is when i avoided meeting my gf for weeks making some excuse.And the day i finally did she came towards me from some distance with all smiles but when she took a good look at me i could notice the smile suddenly vanished and she look surprised.She told me that i was looking weird.i could clearly see that she was feeling embarrassed to introduce me to her batchmates as her bf.The following day she dumped me.I dont really blame her for anything,She was extremely goodlooking and she did deserve some1 who looked really good.In your early tweenties its not all about the person from within,looks do matter!!,so i dont really blame her.I just felt like a loser alltogeter.It was not because of my breakup, it was because i felt life was changing.It was not the same.The worst part being there is no history of hairloss in my family.I dont know why this is happening to me

 

I have been on the big there i.e finastride,minoxidil and nizoral for 4 months and it has been working excellently well for my crown.It has even reversed my miniaturised hair to a great extent.I will be considering a hair transplant in the future.

 

Hang in there man.There are meds which are working and a possible hair transplent in the future to restore your hair.Just hope for the best.Think positive.B+v2

 

B,

 

I guarantee you a girl that breaks up with you primarily from hair loss will be divorced later on in life, this is a guarantee my friend. I feel like girls that are that shallow are trash, and that would still be my opinion if I wasnt suffering from hairloss, don't sweat it, there are plenty of great girls out there that arent extremely superficial.

 

-Bleach

[TheEmperor]

Originally posted by B+ve:

azazelgs,

 

I can completely relate to what you are going through.I am 22 and my confidence has taken a beating because of hairloss.The ego inside me has completely dissapeared.In just a couple of months time the feeling that when u are walking down the street and nobody even notices u suddenly vanishes is really upsetting.I just feel invisible to the girls all of a sudden.My long time gf dumped me some moths back back because i was losing hair.For some people the hair really reflects on the face n i was probably 1 amongst them.My hair made me look good and now it makes me look ugly.All of a sudden my wavy thick hair started miniaturising very badly and it was like a head full of of really ugly looking shapeless curly hair.My hairline started receding.This is when i avoided meeting my gf for weeks making some excuse.And the day i finally did she came towards me from some distance with all smiles but when she took a good look at me i could notice the smile suddenly vanished and she look surprised.She told me that i was looking weird.i could clearly see that she was feeling embarrassed to introduce me to her batchmates as her bf.The following day she dumped me.I dont really blame her for anything,She was extremely goodlooking and she did deserve some1 who looked really good.In your early tweenties its not all about the person from within,looks do matter!!,so i dont really blame her.I just felt like a loser alltogeter.It was not because of my breakup, it was because i felt life was changing.It was not the same.The worst part being there is no history of hairloss in my family.I dont know why this is happening to me

 

I have been on the big there i.e finastride,minoxidil and nizoral for 4 months and it has been working excellently well for my crown.It has even reversed my miniaturised hair to a great extent.I will be considering a hair transplant in the future.

 

Hang in there man.There are meds which are working and a possible hair transplent in the future to restore your hair.Just hope for the best.Think positive.B+v2

 

If this is true, you should go over to her house "as a friend", to drop somnething off or pick something up. Tell her that you need to use the bathroom.

 

WHile in there, pour out her shampoo and replace it with Nair.

 

That will teach her some much needed humility.

[EpilepticSceptic]

Hairloss is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I truly mean this. Although I am not bald (NW3.5ish) at age 41, most all of the loss occured between ages 20-25. Before the hairloss I literally had to beat women off with a stick. I guess you could say my facial features and body type fit very well in the GQ model category.

 

Anyway, once the hairline receded I became acutely aware of just how superficial our society is. Something as utterly meaningless as a few thousand strands of keratin actually caused 99.9% of all the women who had previously chased me to suddenly look right through me as if I didn't exist. I went from an egocentric narcissistic pretty boy to a reclusive hermit literally overnight.

 

But guess what ? I actually became a much better person in the process. When I look back I wouldn't trade the hairloss for anything! It taught me to be more sensitive and less judgemental of others' appearence. Since that time I have met lifelong soulmate friends who are some of the most amazing, talented people and who have had tremendous impact on my life and identity. I know for sure I would never had met these people if I would have remained that narcisisstic superficial pretty boy.

 

I also realized that my personality thrives in the "underdog" role. Since I now had a cosmetic deficiency I was amazingly free from all of the superficial trappings of the beautiful people. I became an artist (piano player, singer)and have never looked back since! The hairloss actually gave me the courage to face audiences because I could no longer hide behind good looks, and people had to take me seriously.

 

I also realized that my former relationships with women were meaningless and shallow; they didn't even care who I was a person on the inside, and just saw me as a piece of meat out of a GQ magazine. I was objectified in the same way that gorgeous women complain men see them as sex objects.

 

Now that I'm older i can see all of this so clearly. The only people that truly matter in this world are those who can accept you and love you for who you are inside. Everybody else will just be a waste of your time and energy, whether you have hair or not!

[youngsuccess]

Originally posted by splitting hairs:

 

Whenever I feel down about hair loss - I think what it must have been like for my dad - no propecia, no rogaine, no good transplants - it was a case of wear a wig or live with it.

 

 

That's definitely one way to keep things in perspective. In some sense, I think younger balding men are living in much more tolerant times. Guys with hair loss might not always like these alternatives, but shaving your head or regularly wearing a hat weren't even socially acceptable options up until relatively recently. Nowadays, buzzing down is considered a very practical way of dealing with thinning hair, even in an image-obsessed world. It can also be a fashion statement if you're able to pull it off well.

 

Hats can be fashionable, too. I know someone who has incorporated a stylish newsboy-type cap into his wardrobe; it's pretty much become part of his identity, even at work. And no one is going to say, "Hey, take that off at the table" when we're out eating. Most guys don't want to start "hiding" under anything, but it's still an everyday coping mechanism that works for a lot of people who may be biding their time before a transplant. Hats get a bad rap because a lot of guys automatically visualize a dingy old baseball cap, but there are a lot of options that get taken for granted.

[TheEmperor]

Originally posted by labrat69:

Hairloss is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I truly mean this. Although I am not bald (NW3.5ish) at age 41, most all of the loss occured between ages 20-25. Before the hairloss I literally had to beat women off with a stick. I guess you could say my facial features and body type fit very well in the GQ model category.

 

Anyway, once the hairline receded I became acutely aware of just how superficial our society is. Something as utterly meaningless as a few thousand strands of keratin actually caused 99.9% of all the women who had previously chased me to suddenly look right through me as if I didn't exist. I went from an egocentric narcissistic pretty boy to a reclusive hermit literally overnight.

 

But guess what ? I actually became a much better person in the process. When I look back I wouldn't trade the hairloss for anything! It taught me to be more sensitive and less judgemental of others' appearence. Since that time I have met lifelong soulmate friends who are some of the most amazing, talented people and who have had tremendous impact on my life and identity. I know for sure I would never had met these people if I would have remained that narcisisstic superficial pretty boy.

 

I also realized that my personality thrives in the "underdog" role. Since I now had a cosmetic deficiency I was amazingly free from all of the superficial trappings of the beautiful people. I became an artist (piano player, singer)and have never looked back since! The hairloss actually gave me the courage to face audiences because I could no longer hide behind good looks, and people had to take me seriously.

 

I also realized that my former relationships with women were meaningless and shallow; they didn't even care who I was a person on the inside, and just saw me as a piece of meat out of a GQ magazine. I was objectified in the same way that gorgeous women complain men see them as sex objects.

 

Now that I'm older i can see all of this so clearly. The only people that truly matter in this world are those who can accept you and love you for who you are inside. Everybody else will just be a waste of your time and energy, whether you have hair or not!

 

Just stating the obvious: If you've got it all worked out, why are you hanging out on a hair transplant forum?

[why oh why]

Originally posted by TheEmperor:

 

 

Just stating the obvious: If you've got it all worked out, why are you hanging out on a hair transplant forum?

 

probably to help share with others about personal situations. for example

 

Originally posted by labrat69:

Hairloss is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I truly mean this. Although I am not bald (NW3.5ish) at age 41, most all of the loss occured between ages 20-25. Before the hairloss I literally had to beat women off with a stick. I guess you could say my facial features and body type fit very well in the GQ model category.

 

Anyway, once the hairline receded I became acutely aware of just how superficial our society is. Something as utterly meaningless as a few thousand strands of keratin actually caused 99.9% of all the women who had previously chased me to suddenly look right through me as if I didn't exist. I went from an egocentric narcissistic pretty boy to a reclusive hermit literally overnight.

 

But guess what ? I actually became a much better person in the process. When I look back I wouldn't trade the hairloss for anything! It taught me to be more sensitive and less judgemental of others' appearence. Since that time I have met lifelong soulmate friends who are some of the most amazing, talented people and who have had tremendous impact on my life and identity. I know for sure I would never had met these people if I would have remained that narcisisstic superficial pretty boy.

 

I also realized that my personality thrives in the "underdog" role. Since I now had a cosmetic deficiency I was amazingly free from all of the superficial trappings of the beautiful people. I became an artist (piano player, singer)and have never looked back since! The hairloss actually gave me the courage to face audiences because I could no longer hide behind good looks, and people had to take me seriously.

 

I also realized that my former relationships with women were meaningless and shallow; they didn't even care who I was a person on the inside, and just saw me as a piece of meat out of a GQ magazine. I was objectified in the same way that gorgeous women complain men see them as sex objects.

 

Now that I'm older i can see all of this so clearly. The only people that truly matter in this world are those who can accept you and love you for who you are inside. Everybody else will just be a waste of your time and energy, whether you have hair or not!

 

 

-------------------

 

az- it's all about the confidence

[EpilepticSceptic]

Originally posted by TheEmperor:

 

 

Just stating the obvious: If you've got it all worked out, why are you hanging out on a hair transplant forum?

 

Good question. Well, even though I feel it has been a blessing doesn't mean that there isn't still a side of me that feels as though I've learned the lesson in humility and shouldn't have to live with being half bald anymore since viable options exist these days. Wearing the ball and chain of balding for 20 years has built character for sure, but does that mean that I have to wear it for the rest of my life ? I think I have learned the lesson intended for me, so now I feel pretty good about improving my appearence.

 

Another thing is that I am half bald (NW3.5ish) and 41 years old. 5000 grafts in the hands of the right surgeon will likely make me look like a healthy NW2. When I was 25 I was absolutely positive that I'd be a Norwood 6 by age 30. But I have since discovered that I must have inherited more of my grandfather's genes on my mother's side. He was a NW 3 his entire life until he died in his late 60s.

 

So I am here because I feel like I am a really good cantidate for HT surgery. I would not say that I have it "all worked out" as you imply. Yes, I wouldn't change anything about my life up until this point (including the hairloss); but that doesn't mean that I have to accept something that has always bothered me on a emotional level, though I turned it around into something positive.

 

It's almost like somebody who goes sailing in the ocean and their boat capsizes, and they have to live on a deserted island for awhile. In a situation like that you can get tough and make the best of it (turn a negative into a positive), or you can panic and die. But after 20 years of living on that island, does that mean when you see a ship cruising by one day that you shouldn't start a fire and gain its' attention ? This is kind of how I see things with my options concerning HT today. Does it mean I am superficial ? Some would think so, but in my own mind it's just simply knowing that I will look more like my own self-image than I do now.

 

Concerning the younger guys dealing with this, I just wanted to let them know that it doesn't have to be the end of the world. There's nothing worse than looking like a GQ model one day and waking up the next day with a vanished hairline. I think that's the hardest part of hairloss when it's rapid, because your whole identity is changed seemingly overnight. Had you always been ugly from birth then you'd be used to it and it wouldn't be as big of a deal. But most of us who look good with hair and VERY different without will undergo psychological trauma. But like everything bad that happens in life, you need to see the glass half full and turn it into a positive. You can't let it turn into manic depression because that will only lead to wasted time and energy with no positive outcome.

[caggy]

I think most people with hairloss have a hard time at the start, as its the shock of it all. I didnt notice my loss until around 27, by that time I'd be going out drinking for 10 years and felt I had enough of that sort of life.

 

I think when you lose your hair in the teens and early 20's it must be very tough because thats the sort of age your self image is important for attracting girls etc...

 

Thankfully I'd got all that out of my system, not that I didnt want to feel attractive to the opposite sex but I felt other things were more important as I reached my 30's.

 

Now I'm 35 I think I view it in a more balanced way, there are many things more important than hair and I really only think about it when I'm bored lol.

 

I have lost most of my hair on top but I brush my hair down to cover it, its not perfect but I prefer my hair brushed down anyway. I have a very high hairline so its king of tough to grow my hair long enough to look right.

 

Here's a pic:-

 

I know I wont be able to carry on forever (although you never know lol), but a transplant is a possibilit, I have the money but not the will, I'm also scared of fins sides. I did try toppik and was very happy with the results but dont think I need it...yet!

 

What is very important is perspective.

[MikeTheDane]

Labrat, you bring some good insight and some very similar thoughts I've been having myself.

 

Though 5 years was enough for me, I know what you mean. It's an ambivalent relationship really, because on one hand you want to be free from the bonds, but on the other hand you know that they shaped you into being the man you are today.

 

Thumbs up for a good post.

[Chris in Seattle]

Well I think that everyone needs to find the solution that works best for them. Despite the strength of this community, it's a very individual thing. Some people are more suited to shave their head than others, and some are more suited to do nothing. I'm not "superficial", but as much as we try to emphasize what's on the inside and all that, it doesn't help if we're completely obsessed with hairloss and how it makes us feel. And it's not really so much about age. Sure, a younger person is more likely to lose more hair, but it also depends on the individual so there's no reason why they shouldn't consider a consultation with a great surgeon if their hairloss is in an advanced enough stage (which it very well may be).

 

As for me, I'm single, 30+, a musician, free-spirit, and I feel just as devastated as many guys in their early twenties feel. Of course, not everyone over 25 has the same lifestyle and is settled and just ready to accept it. I just got a hair transplant 5 days ago and I feel absolutely fantastic about it. I only hope that more people will experience the same joy, if and when it's the right decision for them.

[EpilepticSceptic]

Chris,

 

Who did you have your Ht with ?

 

I'm actually alot more fortunate than I thought I would be in my 20s when the hairfall started. My hairline around the temples went almost overnight, but the forelock and top remained very solid. Even today at 41 the top and forelock are pretty good (NW3.5/4ish).

 

I'm one of those guys who looks radically different without a hairline to frame the face. For me it was probably age 23 where things really started to fall apart. Try to imagine Tom Cruise as a NW4 and you'll get the drift. With hair I'm a ladykiller, and without it just another faceless baldie in the crowd.

 

I've been stomaching this for about 17 years now, and it's finally time for a change because I know that I'm a very good candidate. I managed to avoid total desolation (NW6/7) and it doesn't look like that will be in my cards now. I feel like I've been released from death row, literally !!

[Chris in Seattle]

Labrat,

 

To answer your question, I had my HT done by Dr. Gabel in Oregon. I HIGHLY recommend him and could not have made a better choice.

 

It's very true what you said about some guys looking radically different with/without hair. It's a bit like a girl with beautiful dark hair who dyes it blond. Often it just washes out her complexion and she doesn't look as good.

 

So are you saying that you've been considering a HT for 17 YEARS?! Well what's stopping you from pursuing it?

 

Dr. Gabel - March 8, 2010

4115 Grafts

1s - 958

2s - 2209

3s - 849

4s - 99

Total Hairs - 8319

[EpilepticSceptic]

Chris,

 

Been considering a HT for 1-2 years since I discovered these forums and seen how far the technology has come. Thought about it in the 90s but since I have a sales background it was easy for me to see through the pitch.

 

Been dealing with a widows peak now for 17 years though! My pattern is very peculiar cause it struck early on but then just halted. I've seen so many friends who had no hairloss until late 20s go to NW6/7 by 40. Me, I'm still at late NW3v/early NW4. Loss has been stable for at least 10 years, more like 15 really. Very bizarre cause from 20-25 I thought for sure I'd be a cueball by now.

 

I'll be in the chair probably sometime around early summer. Seen too many guys now with my level of loss pretty much get all of it back. Also, tired of seeing NW5/6 dudes on these forums with more hair than me now. That's real kick in the butt to get moving for sure!