Performart123 Posted February 14, 2010 Share Posted February 14, 2010 Hey...I have been reading this forum for a while but just joined. I am 26 and started experiencing extreme hair loss at an early age. Like many people here, I got on Propecia and it worked wonders for me. I got a 1800 HT last year and I am really happy with the results. I secured my front (mature) hairline and the right side of my head so I could part my hair. In addition, I came out as gay last year. Last year was rough to say the least. I am a former D1 athlete and very masculine. Everyone who I tell is shocked. I have been dating someone for the last 3 months and I am in love. However, my left side is thinning a bit. Nothing too crazy but I know I have to deal with it. As I fall more for this guy every week my anxiety level increases. I am afraid he will see this too. I dont really know what to do. I am meeting with my doctor next week to discuss the results. Should I just tell my bf and hopefully relieve the anxiety? Like many young guys here, I am happy I got the HT but scarred of the next step. It was such a long process and I am a working professional. I was thinking I could keep replenishing with smaller FUE sessions every few years but I recently read the quality and amount aren't as good. Any advice or comments would be awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member why oh why Posted February 15, 2010 Senior Member Share Posted February 15, 2010 i have not had a HT, so i can't necessarily comment on that, or the feelings towards disclosure of having had one. However, i know full well the anxiety that comes with thinning and new relationships. While it can be stressful dealing with the anxiety of "will they notice", it is definitely something that can ooze out and infect the aura of the relationship. My best advice is to just flat try and not worry about it. If the other person is going to be shallow enough to ditch you cause you're losing a little up top, then they probably aren't worth the anxiety. the best thing to do is to try and relax. the more confidence and fun you exude, the better. just relax, know that you're talking to your doc (if a second ht or whatever is the route you wish to go) and take things in stride. my reg is: propecia 1mg EVERYDAY minox 5% twice daily (f the foam) nizoral 1% say la V old buddies .... i'm tryin to keep you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member youngsuccess Posted February 15, 2010 Senior Member Share Posted February 15, 2010 What you're experiencing is normal and completely understandable: No guy wants to go around advertising the fact that he's had a hair transplant. However, if you're planning on making a long-term commitment to both your hair and your partner, it's inevitably going to come up at some point. The closer you get, the less privacy you'll have; it will become much harder to keep something like this hidden, especially since hair loss is progressive. I was able to disguise the work I had done from my girlfriend for years, but there were random periods when I seemed distant and unaffectionate due to all of the sneaking around and recovery downtime. Everything turned out A-OK when I finally came clean. There's no reason to rush into talking about it if you're not in the right comfort zone yet, but if keeping the secret bottled up starts to negatively affect the relationship, then it's probably time to open up before you do more harm than good. ------- All opinions are my own and my advice should not constitute as medical advice. View my My Hair Loss Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member Maxxy Posted February 15, 2010 Senior Member Share Posted February 15, 2010 Of course you're going be nervous and scarred about telling him but it's going be difficult hiding future procedures, even with small FUE sessions questions will arise. Would you think less of him if he told you he had work done or planned on getting work done? Of course not... so if he does, then maybe he isn't the one for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member Am0986 Posted February 16, 2010 Regular Member Share Posted February 16, 2010 I am glad this topic came up. I am going through the same thing with my relationship. Except my gf is a hair stylist so she wants to cut my hair. I have so much anxiety so I think I am just going to tell her. Check out My Hair Loss Web Blog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member MikeTheDane Posted February 27, 2010 Senior Member Share Posted February 27, 2010 I think you should just come clean. On the bright side, a man would in general have an easier time understanding why you did it than a woman would. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11/04-07 - 800-1600 ish grafts - danish clinic - poor results 12/02-08 - 2764 grafts - Dr. Devroye - good result but needs hairline density 03/12-10 - 1429 grafts - Dr. Mohmand - result pending Feel free to visit my picture thread My Hair Transplant Photos - Surgery with Dr. Devroye Young lads below 25 unite! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member SoccerBoy Posted October 30, 2010 Regular Member Share Posted October 30, 2010 Always be honest. I lost a relationship for literally this reason, lying to my partner about why i became so distant. Someone mentioned something golden earlier, "what would you say if he came with this to you?" Always a good rule of thumb to see how you would react if the tables were turned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member Spanker Posted November 1, 2010 Senior Member Share Posted November 1, 2010 If he is as serious about you as you are about him then you should tell him. Clearing the air might be hard, but you will feel like you can breathe. If you are a masculine gay athlete....coming clean to your partner about a transplant should be way easier than coming out. I am an online representative for Dr. Raymond Konior who is an elite member of the Coalition of Independent Hair Restoration Physicians. View Dr. Konior's Website View Spanker's Website I am not a medical professional and my opinions should not be taken as medical advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member LadyNeedsHair Posted November 3, 2010 Regular Member Share Posted November 3, 2010 I think you have had a lot of anxiety over a lot of things and it would help you to share this with him. If he cares for you like you do for him, it will probably end up being a great support system and a step forward in your relationship. Isn't it about being who we really are anyway? You are in love! Don't let this complicate things, take a deep breath, tell him and you will be relieved and can go forward to the good stuff My Hair Loss Website - Hair Transplant with Dr. Cooley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member ziggy00 Posted March 18, 2011 Senior Member Share Posted March 18, 2011 I'm sure telling him would help with the anxiety, but I agree with youngsuccess: you don't have to rush into it yet. It is still early in your relationship and if you're not comfortable you can still wait. Just make sure you aren't pulling away too much. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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