Change your attitude

[SimpleLife]

It is normal to be insecure about your looks. Many celebrities & even a G like Zlatan Ibrahimovic got a nose job. So dont feel bad about doing a HT/SMP in our case. The problem arises when you hide or lie about it. Because now youre just telling the world that you’re insecure.

‘’Hiding your insecurities is like bleeding next to a shark’’

Attitude is everything.

Even if it looks 100% natural I wouldnt hide the fact you had a HT, unless you dont want people to ask a zillion questions which is an acceptable reason. No secrets/insecurities and the ability to make fun of yourself seems to be the perfect blueprint to live freely rather than someone that is caged in their own thoughts.

Same story for SMP. The last thing you want is to wear a hat to hide your balding, only to wear a hat again to hide the SMP. IMO the goal with SMP is not to pretend like you have hair follicules and decided to keep it short. Its to give your face a frame, thats literally it. Obviously you dont want it to look extremely fake which draws attention, but that speaks for itself.

There is a popular guy in the Netherlands named Andy van der Meijde. He has done SMP with the perfect mentality. Tells everyone he had it done & makes jokes about it. You literally cant hurt him with, cuz he owns it.

Let me give you another example, UFC welterweight champion Kamaru Usman. People made jokes about his old (nick)name ‘’Marty’’ for 1-2 years straight and every time it would make him insecure.

Here is a short example: https://youtu.be/JRzHbbca2AY

After a while he memed about it himself & now literally NO ONE even mentions it:

Edited June 20, 2022 by SimpleLife

[SimpleLife]

Best post that I have seen regarding SMP

https://www.reddit.com/r/SMPchat/comments/sfoh2k/ive_seen_guys_with_smp_in_real_life_scalp_shine/ 

[Gatsby]

23 minutes ago, SimpleLife said:

’Showing others your insecurities is like bleeding next to a shark’

Actually from my experience in life showing your insecurities shows that you have the courage to be honest and authentic by having nothing to hide. This is a quality that in time you will find mature people will value as it makes them feel less secretive about their own insecurities. I'll give you one example. When I wore a hair piece I owned it like a boss and joked about it. Several girlfriends, when I spoke about it suddenly for the first time in their lives felt comfortable enough to share with me their own insecurities (ie their tits were too big/small, their arse was too big, etc, which was all unfounded). As a result it allowed them to feel open enough to share their fears and insecurities for the first time in their lives. As human beings we are more alike than dissimilar. Sharing insecurities is not only cathartic but it is also what it means to be human.

[SimpleLife]

5 minutes ago, Gatsby said:

Actually from my experience in life showing your insecurities shows that you have the courage to be honest and authentic by having nothing to hide. This is a quality that in time you will find mature people will value as it makes them feel less secretive about their own insecurities. I'll give you one example. When I wore a hair piece I owned it like a boss and joked about it. Several girlfriends, when I spoke about it suddenly for the first time in their lives felt comfortable enough to share with me their own insecurities (ie their tits were too big/small, their arse was too big, etc, which was all unfounded). As a result it allowed them to feel open enough to share their fears and insecurities for the first time in their lives. As human beings we are more alike than dissimilar. Sharing insecurities is not only cathartic but it is also what it means to be human.

Youre 100% right 

I fcked up the quote🤣

Its ''hiding'' instead of ''showing'' - Changed it

Edited June 20, 2022 by SimpleLife

[mafpe]

good one man.

in a way it's true what they say "your worst critic is yourself", especially when dealing with insecurity.

people do judge you based on your head of hair sometime, but most of the time it you yourself doing it when looking at the mirror every day. sure your attractiveness is better when you seem to have a head full of hair, but what's better is self confidence. it is hard, and you'll have to fake it till you make it. but after that? if you wonder why some men with bald head is having better luck with the chicks than someone with a head full of hair, that's one of the reason.

people who are the worst critic are usually people who are dealing with the same problem, an expert at it, or your plain old grinch. i've seen several threads here that said their or other's hairline looks pluggy. hell, there are only a few of them, not even more than fingers in one hand, not to mention they're all doubles, not thick quadruples. most of the people who looks at you won't even know that it's a transplant. i've just gotten mine, and it's not perfect but so far i'm good with it.

my hair loss has never been my biggest problem although it does contribute a lot to it. i can say these because even before my HT, i did this 'fake it till you make it'. It worked. for me. i make a joke out of my insecurity, and people actually opens up to me more, and gave me better confidence. same as what people call vicious cycle, it repeats itself, but this isn't vicious, it's good. it then gets easier for me to change my attitude toward my own life, because i've accepted myself.

with problem, do what you can. but if it's out of your control, there is no use worrying about it.

[BaldReaper]

1 hour ago, Gatsby said:

Actually from my experience in life showing your insecurities shows that you have the courage to be honest and authentic by having nothing to hide. This is a quality that in time you will find mature people will value as it makes them feel less secretive about their own insecurities. I'll give you one example. When I wore a hair piece I owned it like a boss and joked about it. Several girlfriends, when I spoke about it suddenly for the first time in their lives felt comfortable enough to share with me their own insecurities (ie their tits were too big/small, their arse was too big, etc, which was all unfounded). As a result it allowed them to feel open enough to share their fears and insecurities for the first time in their lives. As human beings we are more alike than dissimilar. Sharing insecurities is not only cathartic but it is also what it means to be human.

trying to hide something and failing makes it look even more visible

[SimpleLife]

1 hour ago, mafpe said:

good one man.

in a way it's true what they say "your worst critic is yourself", especially when dealing with insecurity.

people do judge you based on your head of hair sometime, but most of the time it you yourself doing it when looking at the mirror every day. sure your attractiveness is better when you seem to have a head full of hair, but what's better is self confidence. it is hard, and you'll have to fake it till you make it. but after that? if you wonder why some men with bald head is having better luck with the chicks than someone with a head full of hair, that's one of the reason.

people who are the worst critic are usually people who are dealing with the same problem, an expert at it, or your plain old grinch. i've seen several threads here that said their or other's hairline looks pluggy. hell, there are only a few of them, not even more than fingers in one hand, not to mention they're all doubles, not thick quadruples. most of the people who looks at you won't even know that it's a transplant. i've just gotten mine, and it's not perfect but so far i'm good with it.

my hair loss has never been my biggest problem although it does contribute a lot to it. i can say these because even before my HT, i did this 'fake it till you make it'. It worked. for me. i make a joke out of my insecurity, and people actually opens up to me more, and gave me better confidence. same as what people call vicious cycle, it repeats itself, but this isn't vicious, it's good. it then gets easier for me to change my attitude toward my own life, because i've accepted myself.

with problem, do what you can. but if it's out of your control, there is no use worrying about it.

True man, I never had a lot of self esteem because of acne & later on hairloss, even tho I had girls hitting on me and even mothers pushing their daughter to marry me lol. Now that I look at things from a different perspective I see so many people with ''flaws'' have success in all facets of life all the time. It really doesnt matter, making minor things bigger in our head ruins lives.

There was a relatively short guy at highschool, but he was cool & jacked so I literally never noticed it, only years later I realized that he was short. It was not a ''thing'' in my head so I was not looking for it, the exact same way the redditposter described..

Personally now that my donor is fcked I tend to look at other peoples donor area🤣 Laughing with pain

[Melvin- Admin]

5 hours ago, Gatsby said:

Actually from my experience in life showing your insecurities shows that you have the courage to be honest and authentic by having nothing to hide. This is a quality that in time you will find mature people will value as it makes them feel less secretive about their own insecurities. I'll give you one example. When I wore a hair piece I owned it like a boss and joked about it. Several girlfriends, when I spoke about it suddenly for the first time in their lives felt comfortable enough to share with me their own insecurities (ie their tits were too big/small, their arse was too big, etc, which was all unfounded). As a result it allowed them to feel open enough to share their fears and insecurities for the first time in their lives. As human beings we are more alike than dissimilar. Sharing insecurities is not only cathartic but it is also what it means to be human.

Well said agree 💯 

[Marko7t4]

Hair loss can be a daunting thing for a lot of men. Trying to hide it for years, then getting a HT will make someone feel insecure, because men are expected to be a certain way, act a certain way, look a certain way. It’s just the way society is. Men will take the piss out of each other for the slightest thing, whereas women tend to support each other (then just talk about each other behind their backs 😂). I always felt insecure about my hair loss, but once I decided I needed a HT, I just embraced it and told whoever wanted to know, and some people who didn’t. My wife has a friend who had a boob job. She got nothing but support and compliments from all of her friends about it. Unfortunately men tend not to be like that. However, I’ve noticed that since I had my HT, my friends have actually started complimenting it, rather than ripping me to shreds about it. 

[NARMAK]

I completely understand where you're coming from OP but if i may i'd like to put a counterpoint to it. 

You don't "owe" anybody else an explanation or have to "own it" at all. It's none of their business. Whether they'd be supportive or try to ridicule you, but you can "own it so they can't make fun of you if you were open" is irrelevant. 

Every person out there has a right to privacy and share only whatever they feel comfortable sharing. Some feel happy to openly share details, even if considered TMI at times whilst others remain schtum. 

The people who "Don't own it" when constantly pushed by people repeatedly asking them something that's not any of their business need to learn some manners, and get lost. 

Personally i have only chosen to share my journey in my personal life with only my immediate family and even telling them to keep it to themselves, and a couple of friends. One who has been for a HT himself before and has been great at helping me with questions, and one that also suffers from hair loss and was considering it. However i don't openly need to go tell other people i know. I shared my journey here with my face blurred for privacy but in a way to hopefully document my journey and help others. I do want to help others, but i also like my privacy. 

So people like Gatsby above have my admiration for being as open as they are and happy to share themselves, their journey and so on, but that's their choice. I do wonder if maybe things were different and they had situations change whether perhaps they'd do it differently. Only they know. 

I'm personally not planning to tell people because as i said, it's none of their business. Unless somebody was serious and approached it from the angle of treating their hair loss, getting a HT etc. i don't really care to divulge it. 

[follically challenged]

On 6/20/2022 at 11:18 AM, SimpleLife said:

Because now youre just telling the world that you’re insecure.

I'll go against the grain here and say I don't entirely agree with what you're saying...

Sure, owning up and saying you had a HT surely shows you're confident enough to admit it / to 'own' it and don't mind all the questions. But that doesn't mean that you are NOT insecure about your looks simply because you admitted to getting work done....on the contrary, it shows that you absolutely WERE insecure about your looks....and hence had a HT.

Secondly, IMO, there is a very valid reason to keeping your HT a secret (if possible). One reason that i would choose to (try to) keep it a secret, if i get work done in the future, is because I simply get tired of people looking up at the high hairline when talking to me. It's a sh*tty feeling.

And to have friends and family know that I had a HT, I am pretty sure that they'd always be asking questions and that their eyes would occasionally be glancing up there, not out of disrespect of course - most likely out of curiosity - but would it would still annoy the hell out of me.

Don't get me wrong, I am not knocking people who are out in the open about getting work done, but i don't think it is right to imply that is always the best way to go about it.

Everyone is different.

 

[jjsrader]

There are so many personality types out there.  People can really only 'be' the way they really are in the end.  Frankly, I see very very few ultra-successful and/or wealthy or powerful male or females NOT in the public eye acknowledging plastic surgery.

The whole point is to make changes other people won't notice in an obvious way.

Sure, a few people 'own' it but this is the vast vast minority & that will never change.

The majority of those that 'own' it have nothing to lose because they are not in positions of power or prestige.  The 'majority.'

I'm a nobody in my community & with women but I would never draw attention to my hair restoration or any plastic surgery.  Most independent successful women that are not insecure will not react well to men revealing elective surgery. 

Besides, you can never trust a woman with gossip-type info - they can't help themselves in spreading it around.  It's in their nature.

Just my 2 cents.

Edited June 23, 2022 by jjsrader