Do you regret it

[tacolinowest]

Here's what you gotta do, brah: shave your head. Don't be a pussy. Shave that dome bald. Do you like it? Does it look OK? Would it look OK if you hit the gym and got some muscle definition? (but don't overestimate the effects of this. i sometimes see ripped as hell, but skinny bald dudes who I just think look weird)

 

If this look doesn't work for you, you GET AN HT. I'm sorry for the caps. I'll just describe myself now. I cut it, forgot about it, then saw an old pic years later when I was thinking about cutting it again. Not an option. Looked absolutely terrible.

 

6 month post op. Am I glad I did it?? Yes I am. Do I now have great hair? Nope (well, in poor lighting it can look kind of baller), just looks somewhat OK. Does it look better than before? HELL YEAH. I got to the point I was depressed to even look at myself in the mirror, so I just stopped. Now here's the kicker: am I still losing hair? Unfortunately, yup. I tried going back on Finasteride 1/4ths, but it turned me into a little bitch, so I couldn't stick with.

 

Do I regret it? No. I had implants on the sides to deal with the recession there in addition to my hairline. This is important because hairpieces can be convincingly placed further forward the more hair you have on your sides. In other words, as your side hairline recedes, any hairpiece you wear will have to be worn higher and higher.

so what kind of probs did you have on the quarter dose of fin?

[scar5]

I'm 5'7" and naturally ultra-skinny..... I can say this from experience. The society we live in is so hateful and automatically judgmental it's ridiculous.

 

That's our nature to judge isn't it, before we even think, no choice, switches flicked.

 

But there is some kinda power the bald guy who shaves gets in a social group. This status kinda judgment - OK, he lost his hair, and 'he took it like a man', that makes people warm to him, see him as less threatening 'cause it is a comforting effect rather than a competitive one.

 

And this power does him not one iota of good on his facebook profile. In facebook, he is (to the eyes of a stranger)...ehmm..unfortunate. And in his career too, he'll start behind the other guy and he knows it.

 

You know Style? -the paler-than-ghostly, 5' 6" runt-come-million-book-selling (The Game,2005)-pick-up "guru" who shaved his head...He says he believes, use meds, then shave it all because "balding isn't a choice, bald is"

 

.But HT is a choice too, right?

 

I know a fella shaves his head, and his shtick is, I shaved cause 'I don't care'..and that is all he needs to say. If you think about it for one second it is BS, but key thing is, most people don't have the motivation to think about it cause they are all just in their own head space, and even the balding worried guys who wanna call him out, won't, cause then they'll get the spot light. But even he secretly knows he has had to change his social tactics to get along and succeed in ways at least somewhat spoken for by his decision to shave the head.

 

Ah..just ramblin stuff ya all know too well.

Edited January 30, 2013 by scar5

[jackisback1]

so what kind of probs did you have on the quarter dose of fin?

 

@tacolinowest: my T went down a little. I felt very sluggish and down and depressed. This could obviously be due to tons of factors in my life, but I'd been hitting the gym very well and then a month in being consistent I lost drive/motivation.

 

Also, a new line of some sort started to grow on the left side of my penis where I hadn't seen one before and I felt like I was losing a little hardness so those things together I said it's not worth it. I'm sure that wouldn't have happened if I was just starting out for the first time though...

 

I developed some kinds of either thrombosed veins or scar tissue that affected my penis before I even lost my virginity and it wasn't until I had a 2 year relationship with tons of amazing sex that I gained my confidence back from that BS.

 

I think people should get their Testosterone and DHT levels checked before taking Fin. If you're at 800, then I'd say take the risk, but if you're at 400 like me....well, take the risk very seriously.

[jackisback1]

So this is why I need hair... So I can tell a dirty joke and people will laugh with me, instead of staring at me with revulsion like they actually think I want to rape their cat or something. The difference is night and day. I can say this from experience. The society we live in is so hateful and automatically judgmental it's ridiculous.

 

OtherSyde, you should be happy. You look awesome man. Honestly, I'm really jealous of you, because you look like you have a really good style that should allow you to be 100% carefree and not really worry too much what your hair looks like once you go out for the night. What you say is absolutely right. You walk up to a table of girls and say some sexual shit as in the first picture and you will disgust the crap out of them and creep them out. Ironically, even more so than if you were an uglier male, but with a full head of hair. Something about the bald thing. I think it was a smaller deal 50 years ago (look at all the classic celebrities with terrible hairlines), but now it's not acceptable. (case in point: all the TV ads with ugly looking average Joe everymans who despite that have thick, teenage hairlines) What you say about the difference between a laugh and rape is absolutely spot on. That's why this is about more than just getting laid. It's your whole personality and persona. It is infringed upon once your hairloss reaches a certain age-inappropriate stage. Everything changes. I understand it doesn't *have* to if you're still good looking, but I've got the same big forehead and light skin as you.

 

One time when I was about 2 months post-op I said hi to a girl as I walked down stairs at my apartment (forgot I'd taken off my hat). Her response "hi" was absolute revulsion. I can't imagine a tone of voice being more like "get the fuck away from me". I wondered why, then I remembered I'd just taken off my hat. It made me really sad, but it also made me glad I'd gone through with the operation. Strangers in public during that post-op period just treated me terrible in general and it really did impact how I feel about people in general in a way that I admit is not positive.

 

Still, I'll never be bald unless I'm like 50 and I still look good for my age. HTs, hairpieces, whatever I have to do. Accepting baldness when it doesn't look right is like a woman accepting she has to spend the rest of her life in a bikini and she has terrible cellulite. But for those with a good headshape and skin tone, I have loads of envy. That is complete freedom.

[OtherSyde]

OtherSyde, you should be happy. You look awesome man. Honestly, I'm really jealous of you, because you look like you have a really good style that should allow you to be 100% carefree and not really worry too much what your hair looks like once you go out for the night.

 

Well thanks for that. I guess the only down-side to having styled hair is that if I go in a club and get sweaty, or get wet for any reason (rain, pool water, beach, etc.), I'm back to square 1, which is un-styled hair revealing my still-too-high hairline. At least now it's much easier to style and hide though, in most situations. I no longer feel insecure about it, per se, although I do want to touch up my hairline.

 

 

Something about the bald thing.

 

I think it's a psychological thing in our society; bald male = non-glamorous, not young, simple utilitarian cave-man type that directly contradicts today's socially adept celebrity-obsessed post-MTV-generation ideals and also offends deep-seated values that revolve around the idea that you are on the social level of the company that you accept; if you accept "unsavory, ugly people" then you must be on their level, and you will be treated like them. And most women, being very social animals, are acutely aware of this fact, and do not want that for themselves. If you refuse to accept anything but "pretty," idealized people as your crowd, then that reinforces your higher status in society.

 

Yes it is shallow and stupid, but that doesn't mean it can be ignored. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers.

 

Having hair and/or beauty, for me, is a two-fold thing. One side of it is my comparison of myself to others, internal feelings of adequacy, confidence, etc. The other side is simply a calculating, strategic, almost lizard-brain assessment of what I need to have and need to look like in order to glide through society without being verbally or emotionally accosted, or having negative judgments made against me that do affect a person in the long run. Prettier people get chosen for almost everything (jobs, promotions, inner circles, personal friends) way more often than less-pretty people (it's a proven fact with extensive research backing it up), and so developing good looks isn't just ego-masturbation, it's actually camouflage; it's chameleon-skin, designed to allow you to reap the benefits of life while staying under the radar of an aggressive, stupid society.

 

 

One time when I was about 2 months post-op I said hi to a girl as I walked down stairs at my apartment (forgot I'd taken off my hat). Her response "hi" was absolute revulsion. I can't imagine a tone of voice being more like "get the fuck away from me". I wondered why, then I remembered I'd just taken off my hat. It made me really sad, but it also made me glad I'd gone through with the operation. Strangers in public during that post-op period just treated me terrible in general and it really did impact how I feel about people in general in a way that I admit is not positive.

 

Yeah, I've had that reaction a lot in life. In our society we could really use some of that old-school British politeness and consideration that we consciously eschewed after the Tea Party; that girl had no idea that you'd had a hair transplant, I guarantee it (she wouldn't even know what one looks like), which means she must have just thought you had had some kind of important surgery, or been in a car accident or suffered some painful injury, and she treated you like that anyway - with no pity or politeness, only thinly-veiled contempt. Like, "Ewww, an injured guy, gross! Those scars are so not attractive! He better not talk to me." And that attitude is everywhere today, I see it constantly in the Millennial generation. What the hell is wrong with society today? People are so judgmental and merciless it's sickening.

 

 

Accepting baldness when it doesn't look right is like a woman accepting she has to spend the rest of her life in a bikini and she has terrible cellulite.

 

That is a genius description. Still, judgmental people who were born gorgeous and never have to worry about any kind of insecurity will scoff at such a comment and continue to look down on people who are "inferior" to them.

 

 

But for those with a good headshape and skin tone, I have loads of envy.

 

Don't we all. Screw them.

[joseph123]

Has anyone here been unhappy with their first surgery and decided to get another one?

[tacolinowest]

Has anyone here been unhappy with their first surgery and decided to get another one?

 

yes many people, usually get a bad ht with bad dr, then do research and find a good doc that fixes the prob, its important to do research first because there is only so much donor hair

[Mickey85]

I regret nothing more than having my procedure...

Edited February 19, 2013 by Mickey85

[OtherSyde]

I regret nothing more than having more procedure...

 

Wait, do you mean you regret having multiple procedures more than anything? Did they all go wrong or something?

[Mickey85]

Wait, do you mean you regret having multiple procedures more than anything? Did they all go wrong or something?

 

Oppps sorry, meant to say "I regret nothing more than having MY procedure" not sure why I typed it like that. Only had one procedure.

[OtherSyde]

I've been wondering, what's up with Bosley these days? I remember all their horrible botched HT surgery hack-jobs back in the 90's, but I haven't heard anything about them in a long time. Are they still in business? Are they still botching hair transplants?

[lorenzo]

Maybe Im wrong this is what I heard. Bolsey went bankrupt and was bought out by a Japanese company. They are working hard trying to be the first to start offering hair multiplication. Ever since the internet became a knowledge of education my guess is business has gone down. Years past we all saw the infomercials and I for one wanted to go to them back in 95 but couldnt afford $19 a graft. Right after that I visited Dr. Hasson that worked for a different doctor and he sent me home telling me I didnt need a transplant.

Bosley as far as I know are still open and as long as a person dont owe a computer I am sure they still making money.

 

I read this

 

 

Aderans Research Institute: Hair Regeneration Available by 2014.The Aderans Research Institute has come out with a timeline for finishing testing and bringing to market its Ji Gami hair regeneration method. They have indicated a target date of early 2014. Hair regeneration can generate an unlimited number of hairs from an individual's own hair cells. The process is currently undergoing Phase Two testing. It is interesting to note that patients who have undergone previous conventional hair transplant surgery have been banned from clinical trials. ARI and Bosley are owned by the same company: Aderans Co. of Japan.

 

 

[jackisback1]

that girl had no idea that you'd had a hair transplant, I guarantee it (she wouldn't even know what one looks like), which means she must have just thought you had had some kind of important surgery, or been in a car accident or suffered some painful injury, and she treated you like that anyway - with no pity or politeness, only thinly-veiled contempt. Like, "Ewww, an injured guy, gross! Those scars are so not attractive! He better not talk to me."

 

Man, reading your words, I realize that you think about this in a very similar way that I do. I know everybody here posts things that we can all relate to, but you and I think almost in the exact same way about some of these things it seems as far as the thought pattern, even if it's over something I'd never thought of before.

 

I might be inclined to give that girl the benefit of the doubt about thinking I was injured, but thinking again about it, that may be naive of me. When I said I was glad I went through it, I meant that because I will *never* treat people like that. I held the door open for a very fat girl today as I was walking into the gym even though it was cold. She looked at me like I was crazy she was so surprised. People probably look right through her like she is INVISIBLE (especially at the gym). Obviously, I'm not gonna start hitting on her or flirting with her or shooting the breeze with her for no reason, but I am always going to treat strangers like HUMAN BEINGS. Besides, I know the ego boost I get when a 10 smiles at me. Why not return the favor down the line? haha!

 

I gotta say, though, Syde, why do you sound so angry in your posts? We look GOOD now! We spent all this f'n money for it, so now's the time to ENJOY it, not to be bitter about how shitty people can be!!! Who cares if it looks bad when it gets wet? It looks good 95% of the time! I know you see chicks looking at you in a different way than before. Enjoy that shit!!! I've been working out on the reg, and looking like a BOSS. And I've been catching lots of girls looking at me I had an exgirlfriend who told me at the end of the relationship that she was no longer physically attracted to me and that when she'd first met me she thought I was "so cute" (two yrs prior). And this was coming from an overweight bulimic girl too! After that, and then being the social pariah that is post-OP HT, I f'n thrive off every smile and look I get now! I caught a coworker looking in my eyes in a meeting the other day, and today she messages me asking if I'm single and that she wants to play matchmaker for me. It feels GOOD to be looked at that way again man! And as for sweating in a club or whatever, I don't give a flying F that I'm not the best looking guy in a bar or club, because IT'S NOT IMPORTANT FOR ME TO F THE HOTTEST GIRL IN THE CLUB! I still know I'm a decent looking guy and I'm getting looks from girls that I find attractive on the reg, so why lament that I don't have many chances with a 10 when there are plenty of cute 7s and 8s that would be happy to be with me?

 

I agree with you on everything you say about not wanting to look like a pariah, but we look like bosses now. I look like a boss now. You look like a boss now. CHANGE YOUR AVATAR, BRO, to something that shows how much hair you have better!

 

I'm going to sleep now, because tomorrow I'm going to attack the gym like an animal in the morning just like I did this morning on only 3 hours sleep!

 

PS: If you're receding behind your hairline like I soon will be you better enjoy the f out of it now while you can before you gotta resort to plan B!

 

PPS: anyone reading this who doesn't have the density for a good HT: my personal advice, again, is to get yourself a badass hairpiece and rock that mother with zero shame! The gorgeous people will snicker, and a lot of ugly people will too, but only because they're jealous that you now look better than them again. When I got my HT, I knew 100% sure this ugly F at my office (who happens to have a beautiful, thick, lustrous head of hair) would snipe at me behind my back. Did I run? F NO. I came back into the office at about the 13 day mark, took my seat in my desk right in front of his, and let that c-sucker stare at the nasty scarred up back of my head for weeks!!!!

 

Don't worry about what anyone thinks; do what makes YOU feel better.

 

Sorry for the rant.

Edited February 22, 2013 by jackisback1

[OtherSyde]

Haha I didn't even realize I sounded angry, but I guess I kind of do; I guess being exposed to the "$hittiness of people" has made me aware of its constant presence and it just grinds my gears, even though I'm not on the bad end of it so much anymore. It's like social-rejection PTSD or something. You're right though, I should stop being such a Negative Nancy and just enjoy stuff. I am really happy with my new hair, and about to be a whole hell of a lot more happy - I just paid my reservation fee for my second HT with Dr. Gabel, to slightly advance and greatly thicken up my hairline and temple points on March 27th. I wish it were next week. Oh well, I'll have to anxiously wait. I was at the PlayBar club in Waikiki a few weeks ago and had attractive cougars eyeballing me though... Mmm... Cougars.

 

You're right about my avatar too; ironically, that av is a pic from almost 7 years ago, when I hadn't even really started to bald/recede. I'll make a new one tonight.

 

[EDIT] - New Avatar up.

 

I totally did the same thing at my last workplace with the heckling nerds I worked with too, as far as shaving my head and not even trying to hide the HT/scar. I think I posted this in another thread too, but for about 3-4 months after my first HT they all called me "Smiley" because the long, curved, sutured scar across the lower back of my head looked like Jack Skellington's smile:

 

 

I didn't care; I saw it as deliberately throwing off the painfully desperate false cloak of my old thinning hair, eschewing the stupid ugly grown-out comb-over illusion once and for all, in the wait for something newer and better. To let people poke fun and think I looked like crap, and then have them watch with fascination as my hair sprouted and thickened like a Chia-Pet. 5 months into it I had guys from all over the ship randomly approaching me and quizzing me about the procedure, where to go, if it would work for them, etc.

 

Yeah, I need to hit the gym too. I've been lazy lately, since I caved in to peer pressure at work and bought an XBOX last week with MW: Black Ops II... Now I'm locked into team deathmatches with coworkers way too often to be good for my GPA (still pulling a 3.96 though) or my social life.

 

BTW anyone that has XBOX Live, my handle is OtherSydes (OtherSyde was already taken; the first that's ever happened!).

 

Thanks for the good words though jack! Keep it real man.

Edited February 22, 2013 by OtherSyde

[michaeljames]

Oppps sorry, meant to say "I regret nothing more than having MY procedure" not sure why I typed it like that. Only had one procedure.

 

Hello Mickey85;

 

Many people can regret their surgery; the most common reason is that they made a poor selection in choice of surgeon. In any business medical or otherwise there are levels of competency in skill and integrity in business. The HTN community is a legitimate community to assist and help the consumer in that choice. We cannot change the regret that you have, the important thing is to help you to move forward. I cannot say that another surgery can resolve this issue. However, I do know that in our practice we have been highly successful and assisting people in situations similar to yours. The best hair restoration doctors are not just trying to gain another HT surgery but rather help their patients come up with the best solution to their hair loss and helping them restore self image and esteem. I truly hope this helps you find a new path to improving your experience in resolving your hair loss. All the Best, Michael

[jackisback1]

Hahahaha, dude, same thing happened to me! This bald, married-with-kids guy who's approaching 40 and has no doubt been bald since his 20's saw me at about a month post op and was like "hey [my name], why's there a giant smiley face on the back of your head?" I just laughed and was like I have no idea what the f you're talking about!

[Eagles2199]

Regret it 110% should have just shaved it off and been done with it. I wished I came across this site in 2006-2007 when I was researching it. Had a poor surgery by an incompetent Dr. That almost put me into the nut house. I suffer everyday. Its not that bad now cause I can conceal with my daily hr. hair routine. but I fear the future. It's just really sucks. I appreciate this site so I can vent to people that understand and have walked in my shoes. Just hope I can rectify my situation someday. Just don't know if I have the guts to go through it again . Cheers

[Mickey85]

Hello Mickey85;

 

Many people can regret their surgery; the most common reason is that they made a poor selection in choice of surgeon. In any business medical or otherwise there are levels of competency in skill and integrity in business. The HTN community is a legitimate community to assist and help the consumer in that choice. We cannot change the regret that you have, the important thing is to help you to move forward. I cannot say that another surgery can resolve this issue. However, I do know that in our practice we have been highly successful and assisting people in situations similar to yours. The best hair restoration doctors are not just trying to gain another HT surgery but rather help their patients come up with the best solution to their hair loss and helping them restore self image and esteem. I truly hope this helps you find a new path to improving your experience in resolving your hair loss. All the Best, Michael

 

my surgeon is constantly cited as one of the best in the world on various forums. i also dont appreciate your promotion tactics. in my option it is intrusive to go into threads and basically say 'my doctor can help you'. there are many doctors on this forum that can help, i would rather see their reps post results on a constant basis and make a selection from that.

[Spanker]

my surgeon is constantly cited as one of the best in the world on various forums. i also dont appreciate your promotion tactics. in my option it is intrusive to go into threads and basically say 'my doctor can help you'. there are many doctors on this forum that can help, i would rather see their reps post results on a constant basis and make a selection from that.

 

Mickey,

 

I've missed your story. Have you shared it? I checked your profile but it didn't have any info.

[Mickey85]

Feelin kinda down and wanted to vent some sentiments and didnt want to make a new thread.

[tacolinowest]

Talk to me mick wats on ur mind

[Mickey85]

I just feel ill never be as uninhibited as i was before the surgery champ.. that part really sucks. Cause to go bald is a natural occurance but to have a procedure that failed is partly due to me choosing to undergo a procedure so it feels more foreign and that much worse

[tacolinowest]

i have never seen pics of your situation, but i have a feeling there is light at the end of the tunnel for you, because you have good hair, from what you tell me,,,, but! you will require more surgery, ur in better shoes than a person like me who is an early norwood 6 with low donor density and fine hair

[Mickey85]

I just wish I never bothered at all really.

[tacolinowest]

i no how u feel, like you bought yourself a problem for the rest of your life, i no it sucks but it is fixable,, and since it bothers you alot i think you should fix it what ever way you can,, sure would love to see what it looks like