Slipping into depression over this...

[hrvoje14]

oh boy...! i agree with the others - looks to me like your immediate problem is not your hairloss but your psyche... hairloss can be tough, we've all been there, but thoughts of suicide over a silly, frivolous little thing like that??? it IS inconvenient, frustrating, not ideal, a blow to one's self-confidence etc, etc... but really, it's a problem of luxury, a problem of privilege... you are not hungry or homeless; you are not dying of cancer, or have had both your arms and legs amputated...

 

clearly, by nature, you are prone to anxiety and depression, and the sooner you tackle this, the better... if it wasn't hairloss, i am sure something else would have triggered these drastic feelings in you somewhere down the line... so, my advice - forget about your hairloss for now, work on yourself, your mental and emotional state... and don't make drastic decisions until you are out of this state of heightened emotions... once you are relaxed and positive again, and your hairloss is in perspective, and your dark emotions are under control (whether through counselling or anti-depressants or both), then move forward and tackle the hairloss itself... but only once you've realized how insignificant a thing it is in the grand scheme of things, a mere inconvenience, that's all, certainly not a matter of life and death...

 

all the best!!!

[Raphael84]

hrvoje,

 

You are a 42 year old guy, with still a great head of hair pre HT. Whilst your points are all valid, things could be hugely worse in our lives, non hairloss related. But, with all due respect, you have not quite experienced the same thing. By this I mean being a NW4 or further at 20 years of age. Toward your 40s hairloss is much more accepted and "normal", and you do not generally have the pressures of a guy in his late teens early twentys. Plus, each and every individual is effected differently. Rightly or wrongly, it can be easy to lose grip on reality and see things as much worse than they actually are!

[hrvoje14]

raphael, i see your point, but i think you misunderstood me... i am not saying depression isn't real, or that KWIH's suffering/loss of grip on reality isn't real, or that hairloss is something pleasant... my point is that depression is not a 'normal'/healthy reaction to ANYTHING, not even to much worse things in life than hairloss... which is why THAT is something one needs to work on, one's reaction to things in life, and not necessarily the things themselves...

 

you are right, i am older and it's precisely because of that that i am trying to give you younger guys the benefit of a slightly different perspective... the benefit of experience (20-odd years worth more than you guys have)... and, believe me, i am only trying to help you, not criticise you, or belittle what you may be going through...

 

consider this - if this is your reaction to something like hairloss, how are you going to react to the much worse things that all of us have or will have to deal with in our lives - the death of your parents, illness - your own or of those close to you, the break-up of a long-term relationship, the loss of your job etc etc...

 

it may be hard, but work on yourself, first and foremost (counselling, medication, increased physical activity), on making yourself be positive rather than depressed, relaxed rather than anxious, grateful rather than entitled... notice the 99 things you do have rather than focusing and agonizing on the one thing you don't have... and then you'll be able to tackle the things on the outside no matter what they are...

[hrvoje14]

just re-read what i wrote, sounds like i'm pontificating, which really wasn't my intention... i am deeply moved by what has been said in this thread and that's the only reason i am posting...

 

my point was - you can't always influence/control things in life... the one thing you CAN control, however, is yourself and your reaction to those things... so, if you do ANYTHING, work on THAT... MAKE yourself and your reactions positive and relaxed, and your life will suddenly be so much easier and more beautiful... no matter WHAT is happening around you... it isn't easy, but it can be done...

[Raphael84]

No, I agree. Great outlook. Nicely put!

[KeepingWhatIHave]

Thanks, guys

 

I was going to up the dosage today, under the endocrinologist's supervision, of course, but I caught a bug or flu or something, and I'm just gonna take it easy for a few days...

 

Dang.

[brentipold]

Personally, I don't see why you would rush into this. You haven't given fin a chance to even work yet. I didn't see results till the 3rd or 4th month mark, and your not going to lose all your hair in that span of time. Isn't there a decent amount of ppl who shed when starting to use fin? Didn't a lot of there shedding stop overtime? Also I thought shedding was suppose to be a sign that the medication is working.

[Martin M]

KWIH,

 

If you're totally comfortable with your solution of taking estrogen, more power to you. But if not, then I agree with brentipold that you should give the meds time to work.

 

I am also a 21 year old who has been suffering from hair loss for about a year and a half or so. My hair loss seemed to be free falling and no matter what it never seemed to slow down. Eventually though, 9 times out of 10 it will. And any benefit from hair restoration (meds, ht, etc.) will take TIME. Try your best to be patient, evaluate your progress on the meds, and proceed with an HT when you have a good sense of where your loss is headed and want to respond.

[KeepingWhatIHave]

Doctor and derm told me shedding isn't necessarily a good sign. It means more or less the follicle is getting a shock change that can fall out, and not always come back if shocked too hard.

 

Also you're telling me not to rush into this... and I see so many people who waited too long to do something about their hair loss, and its too late to get great results without a HT. I've been planning this for months and months, since March, really. I'm doing an extreme thing to prevent that from happening at a very early age. Its better to start early, in my opinion, and avoid getting a HT in my 20s if I can

 

I appreciate your comments and contribution to the thread! Thanks.

[MajmX]

I'll have to agree with hair system recommendations. You can still fight hairloss with more conventional meds. Just google Andre Agassi before he got older and decided to shave his hair.

[RajToor]

I agree, just shaved your head and get on some meds. Its risk free.

[thanatopsis_awry]

I wish you the best of luck, and the best results, though I truly do fear for the potential ramifications of your decision.

 

Re: fin, you should be on it for a *minimum* of 6months before you begin to assess it's full efficacy on you. Realistically, it can often take a good year before its potency is fully revealed.

 

Shedding that does occur as a result of fin *is* generally a positive thing, as far as I know, so I'm not sure where your derm is coming from. It is true that "shockloss" exists in certain forms, notably from a HT, but it will not be permnanent loss unless the hairs were already so weak that they stood no chance to the swift hands of time.

 

Again, if a sex change is something you desire irrespective of hairloss that is an *entirely* different thing. I do feel a true concern for you that undergoing such a process simply won't give you what you are after, and that the consequences will bring into play a gravitas more grave and entirely seperate from the hairloss itself.

 

I wish you the best of luck, but if it is truly hair that you desire and aspire to have above all else, you have *far* better options, from a risk/reward analysis, IMHO.

[Dagober]

KeepingWhatIHave,

 

I am touched by reading your posts.

I can FULLY understand how you feel.

i think I am suffering as much as you do.

I am about 29 and started loosing my hairs at around 21-22.

it effected my mental health so much that I did a HT in 2003,was a small session with VERY SMALL (if any) improvements.and I was taking propecia even before that.(still taking propecia).

but it was in 2006,when I really started to panic about my hair.I started wearing caps and hats EVERYWHERE.

I finally managed to get a second hairtransplant in UK in 2008 (UNFORTUNATELY).

which I put all my hope and all my savings into.

18 months on,I have gained a very little hair in the front,and losing more in centre and crown.

I now know I should have researached alot more,AND that a hairtarnsplant is never gonna give most if not all people a full head of hair.and I know the clinic that can give me an acceptable head of hair is H&W in canada (I live in UK).but there is no way I can afford that at the moment.so I still wear hats every day,every where.I HATE IT.i hate to take a comb with me every where I go and go to the bathrooms asap try to comb over my hair if i have to remove this stupid cap.

I avoid almost all social activities,I avoid going to anywhere I can't wear a hat.I hurts me.it's on my mind all the time.

I look a great deal younger when I wear the cap and I am a relatively good looker (whith a hat) it hurts me so bad when I think removing that hat will change all that.it's just so unfare and cruel.

and I have even though abouht what you have decided to do (going thorough sex change and also suicide).because for me too it is impoisible to live as a bald guy (specially with donor scars at back!) and I will definiately consider suicide if that day comes.

BUT i think there is hope.I might get a good hairtransplant at one of these very few good clinics one day which will change everything.

when I feel so down and depressed I usually come to this site and see the pictures of succesfull patients,their stories and their experience it gives me some hope..sometimes it brings tears to my eyes.so I am suffering aswell.

I understand you have started taking male hormone blockers/female hormones,well good luck.but I hope it's not just for the porpuse of hairloss that you are doing this.

I just wanted to say there are some people who suffer from hairloss in a highly worse scale than others,and I think you and me are among those.

sometimes I just WISH (I really mean it) if I could go out without a cap.

hair loss is the worst thing in the world..

[KeepingWhatIHave]

Dagober,

 

Yeah, I know exactly what you're feeling... but for me, looking feminine isn't a big deal, since I've always had long hair anyway, and a pretty feminine face... so taking something to reverse male pattern hair loss in exchange to look more feminine is hardly a sacrifice. To me, anyway. There are tons of guys on this forum who would NEVER sacrifice their masculinity in exchange to keep their hair. And that's their choice. Hair loss doesn't bother these individuals as much as it does us. That's why when we say we're looking into a testosterone blocker or something, some call us sick and say we need some "other" kind of help. Well, to each their own; we're just a lot more sensitive to the fact we don't want to go bald, and will do basically anything to keep what we have. For guys like us, it really is one of the worst things in the world.

 

Hang in there though... hair cloning is supposedly just around the corner, and that could be worth looking into within the next few years.

 

All I can say is don't lose hope... as impossible as it may sound.

 

Good luck