Regular Member MarylandGuy Posted September 19, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted September 19, 2007 morenewhair1 Real Hair Club Member Posted September 19, 2007 02:21 PM Hide Post I might add that we have many mutual friends and I think its best just to not tell her. What if we break up and she spills the beans. I'd rather not chance that. Don't tell her and come up with a valid excuse why you can't see her for a few days. Heck a business trip will even make you seem important. lol If you don't want to do that, then I'd suggest coming up with a medical excuse, as I believe you mentioned. Say you had surgery or say you were working around the house, managed to slip off a ladder and crack your head open in the back which required stitches. Tell her you don't like how it looks and keep it covered up for a few days. Once the scabs have healed up and all you've got left is your incision show her that if you insist. Girls talk as much or more than guys. Sadly, she'll probably tell someone. Not because she's trying to be a jerk, but to her it won't be a big deal and she likes you as is, etc, etc. The end result will be your secret being out. And if you do breakup, it's just about guaranteed she'll tell someone. If you're not at the level where you're sure you can tell her and it won't be a big deal, then it's probably best to keep it to yourself. At some point later you can always tell her and I'm sure she won't be mad that you hid it from her. Good luck man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Al - Moderator Posted September 20, 2007 Moderators Share Posted September 20, 2007 Whoa! Let's stop insulting his girlfriend and friends. We don't know anything about them. His gf could be the hottest, sweetest babe. Just because he's not sure if he should tell his gf about it (totally understandable in my opinion) that doesn't make her fat, a bitch, slut, etc. Insulting his girlfriend is not how to answer someone's questions. Al Forum Moderator (formerly BeHappy) I am a forum moderator for hairrestorationnetwork.com. I am not a Dr. and I do not work for any particular Dr. My opinions are my own and may not reflect the opinions of other moderators or the owner of this site. I am also a hair transplant patient and repair patient. You can view some of my repair journey here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Al - Moderator Posted September 20, 2007 Moderators Share Posted September 20, 2007 Originally posted by morenewhair1:I might add that we have many mutual friends and I think its best just to not tell her. What if we break up and she spills the beans. I'd rather not chance that. The thing is if you have the same friends, SOMEONE is probably going to find out you're lying to her about it and tell her. If you break up and she tells people, so what. It's not going to matter. Besides once your hair starts growing in most people are going to know you did something anyway. Al Forum Moderator (formerly BeHappy) I am a forum moderator for hairrestorationnetwork.com. I am not a Dr. and I do not work for any particular Dr. My opinions are my own and may not reflect the opinions of other moderators or the owner of this site. I am also a hair transplant patient and repair patient. You can view some of my repair journey here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member MarylandGuy Posted September 20, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 Michaellovesnyc Guru Real Hair Club Member Posted September 19, 2007 08:45 PM ...Do you think some slut who is going to judge your self improvement is worth being a liar for? You'll be dumping her fat ass the second it grows in anyway and banging 17 year olds. And the same with this "crowd" you hang out with; they sound like a bunch of assholes and losers too. Get yourself some new friends. Why would you want people like that in your life anyway? I tell you, if you just tell people the truth, I can GUARANTEE you that you will get more positive comments than negative ones (if you get any negative ones at all).If you lie, you are just going to go to hell because thats a sin. Go in Christ dude. lol This isn't a serious response is it? You pass judgement on this guy, his friends, his girlfriend, tell him he's going to hell for lying and then tell him to "Go in Christ dude."? Not to mention you called guys who simply accept their baldness "freaks". I'm no theological scholar, but did you happen to miss the whole "Judge not, lest ye be judged" part of the bible? There are far more constructive ways to get your point across, but the way you put it makes you sound like a very angry, bitter person. And for the record, if he doesn't want anyone to know, depending on his hairstyle, nobody ever will know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 Michaellovesnyc. I am not saying you should be ashamed. I am saying I dont want to let everyone know. Dont read more into it than it is. I simply want advice on how to go about this. Thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 20, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 Morenewhair, I think this is your personal business to tell her or not - you are not married to her. I can understand if your circle of friends might not all understand what hairloss suffers go thru. I think all of us here have things we would not want friends to know about - and they have things they dont want you to know about. Nothing wrong about that. You have to go with your gut feelings. I think it is possible to hide it if the session is not mega-size and you have long enough hair AND can take two weeks away from her. Good luck my friend, NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 20, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 Hey Michael, Is it safe to assume you are not going to vote for Hillary!! LOL NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill - Seemiller Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 morenewhair1, This is certainly a tough call and I can certainly understand your concerns. It is a pickle, no doubt about it. In the end, you are going to have to make a decision that is best for you. One more thing to consider... Even if you don't tell her now...she (along with others) may eventually start wondering why you have more hair, though many only notice something generally different about you rather than the specifics of hair. Some very observant people may notice though and then you are still going to have to conclude what to tell them. But that's another topic . Good luck! Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 nobuzz, or anyone else for that matter. Why would i need 2 weeks away from her, as long as i can avoid her until after the swelling goes down, if i have enough previous hair to cover the scabs, might I be able to pull it off? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 this will be my second HT. first one was 1800grafts 3 yrs ago. This one figures to be around 1600 or so to establish hairline and add density. my current hair is combed forward, similar to a grown out shaved head if you will. you think im being delusional about i might be able to hide it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 20, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 Michael and morenewhair, I know Dr. Feller shaves down the recipient area but many top docs do not require this. If you get buzzed down then you cannot hide unless you stay under a cap. Since Morenewhair has already had a 1800 graft session I think he knows what he is in for. NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member NervousNelly Posted September 20, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 I had a girlfriend once that saw the donor scar and asked about it. I was so nervous and sat her down and acted like I had this huge ultra secretive thing to tell her and after taking about 30 minutes to spit it out she said "oh" and that was it. She didn't even want to inspect my head or anything. It was the wierdest thing ever. We eventually broke up and I don't beleive that she ever said anything to anyone because it was no big deal to her. Hopefully she discussed other things about me with her girlfriends. NN NN Dr.Cole,1989. ??graftcount Dr. Ron Shapiro. Aug., 2007 Total graft count 2862 Total hairs 5495 1hairs--916 2hairs--1349 3hairs--507 4hairs--90 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 20, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 20, 2007 Originally posted by NervousNelly: We eventually broke up and I don't beleive that she ever said anything to anyone because it was no big deal to her. Hopefully she discussed other things about me with her girlfriends. NN Funny story and yes girls will talk! Maybe Mr. Happy was too much for her??? NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member MarylandGuy Posted September 21, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted September 21, 2007 That's interesting about shaving the donor area. I never knew this and it wasn't done with my first ht or I'd have looked pretty silly (I have long hair). Hmm, definitely something to ask about when I go in for number two with a good doc. Always learning something new on this board. Glad I found it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 21, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 21, 2007 MDguy, The donor area is the area in the back and sides where the strip is taken. Only the area shaved is removed then the top and bottom stitched together which has your regular length hair conceals the scar area. The "recipient" area is where the grafts are planted. That area can be shaved down or worked around exsisting length hair depending on which doc is chosen. I do not buzz my hair so it would be hard for me to go to a doc who requires this. There are many great docs who do not require shaving the recipient area. Dr Shapiro, Dr Epstien for example. NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member tuscansun Posted September 21, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted September 21, 2007 It all depends on your hair charecteristics near the recepient area and if you let it grow you should be able to cover it. I had 1500 graft 1 month back and am able to hide it. After my HT i thought I would wear a cap to work but I don't feel the need now and am so glad that I am not wearing a hat to work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 tuscan.. what about a few days, 1 week and so on after the ht, did you longer hair "hide" the transplant well? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member MarylandGuy Posted September 21, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted September 21, 2007 The donor area is the area in the back and sides where the strip is taken. Only the area shaved is removed then the top and bottom stitched together which has your regular length hair conceals the scar area. The "recipient" area is where the grafts are planted. That area can be shaved down or worked around exsisting length hair depending on which doc is chosen. I do not buzz my hair so it would be hard for me to go to a doc who requires this. There are many great docs who do not require shaving the recipient area. Dr Shapiro, Dr Epstien for example. NoBuzz lol Apparently my reading comprehension is just dropping and dropping. All I have to say is duh and or my bad. I think I meant, recipient as opposed to donor, as it seemed that was implied in a few posts, but at this point I'll chalk it up to, I get punched in the head a lot and I was tired when I wrote it. lol Whomever I choose for my next HT will most definitely have to not shave the recipient area, and from what you wrote and everything else I've learned thus far on the board, I should be able to find a great doc who can handle that. Since joining this board I went from being sure I wanted a hair transplant and wanting to get some more info, to actually being excited about getting it done and finding the right Doc for my needs. I'm going to start up a new thread sometime here in the next few days to get opinions on what, who and how many, etc. Man it's hard trying to take a picture of your head with a cell phone camera. lol Back on topic, Morenewhair, just go with your gut. You've now got a bunch of real world opinions, but you're the only one who truly knows your situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member nobuzz4me Posted September 21, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted September 21, 2007 MDguy, I kind of thought that is what you meant donor vs recipient areas. FYI, my recent HT was with Dr. Vogel in Baltimore and he does not require buzzing down. As you can tell from my alias, "nobuzz4me", which means I will never shave my head! (Not to be confused with getting high like in the good old days!) I like having hair! NoBuzz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 3, 2007 Share Posted October 3, 2007 hi all, i'm just wondering , what r u talking about ?! hide redness from ht..i have done it done since 7weekes ago and tis what happened : first i was not bald at all even i do not have any spot with no hair, i just wanted thicker but after the ht for 4000 grafts, i lost most of my existing hair plus there is no redness no any sings can tell i have ht!! now it's almost 2 monthes i never get my existing hair back also no any sign for growth for both existing or new hair ,,is that normal.. i'm so worried if dr. ochs screwed up my life like this ,,i met with him cpl days ago to face him with those issues and all he said that's nprmal and i have to waaaaaaaaaaaaaait ..please advise guys specially if there is some one of you went through those issues ..thnx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member tuscansun Posted October 4, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted October 4, 2007 Hi Morenewhair, I am not sure if you would be able to hide it completely in a week but i would definitely say n a month. In a week time you transplanted hair would still be there and its kinda tough to cover it up with the native hair. Atleast for me it wasn't possibe I am sure there would be others who would have been able to manage to do it. I didnt go out till 4 week without a hat. I feared that my friends would notice it but the first day i went out without hat they wern't able to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member don brasco Posted October 4, 2007 Regular Member Share Posted October 4, 2007 well...its a very complicated situation i wud say as i personally hve experiencedd it...i hve a steady gf n to top dat i share an apt wid my frns..n nt to say the least...i managed hidin it frm thm the whole time...i wud wear a bandana or a hat all the time..lucky for me they didnt really care to ask abt the hat all the time coz infact i wore the hat most of the time while goin out before my procedure...bt ye durin the 5 days of my stay in ottawa for my procedure..i stayed in the motel the whole time watchin tv... so i wud suggest u start wearin a hat most of the time prior to ur surgery so as to get ppl around u see you wid a hat on n nt question ya.......well dt workd for me...m sure for sum ppl too... hope dat helpdd!! don dr rahal 7th june 07 2900 grafts 1.25 finasteride daily Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member Mp96 Posted October 5, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted October 5, 2007 Funny this question appears... Back a couple months ago I was planning on meeting this girl and I kept on making exuses why I couldn't see her because I was just post op. I never wanted to tell her the real reason and she thought I was with another women and she basically doesn't like me to much now. I have tried to contact her and now tell her the truth but she doesn't believe me. So my advise would be is to be honest with her.LOL It will save you a lot of explaining in the end....I made a bad choice by not being honest and it's unfortunate because she was special. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member MORE_HAIR Posted October 5, 2007 Senior Member Share Posted October 5, 2007 Originally posted by Michaellovesnyc:You can try to cover it up a little but I don't think you can completely hide it. Also, some doctors (mine did) will shave the entire area to overlap the grafts so there is not a "line" beween the two. Personally, I have stopped caring about what other people think about what I do because it doesnt matter. I have heard that some docs shave no matter what. Why do some docs shave and others don't ?? Does anyone know if there is a difference ?? Someone told me that that docs that shave only do because it makes the procedure easier for them..........is that true ??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill - Seemiller Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 More_Hair, Shaving the recipient area for a hair transplant is a "hot topic" on this forum. This is because many believe that it provides an optimal surgical environment especially in cases where hair is being transplanted in between a lot of native hair. I stand by this opinion as well however, there are many who disagree. Those who believe in it's benefit will primarily argue that risk of the transection of natural hairs is minimized, temporary shock loss can be minimized (because extra trauma isn't being caused to the native hair by constantly manipulating it and getting it out of the way), and determination of proper hair angulation is easier. Most that disagree with this will point out that many have received superior hair transplant results without having their recipient area shaved. Though I have a tendency to believe that shaving of the recipient area may minimize unnecessary risk, there is no doubt that many hair restoration physicians on our coalition who don't require shaving have delivered state of the art hair transplant results. Best wishes, Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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