Hair Loss and Family Reunions

[MAW99]

I live thousands of miles away from my family. They are all located in the South and I'm on the West Coast.

 

I only see them maybe once or twice a year at family gatherings and trips they make out here for vacation.

 

It seems my balding head is the main part of my appearance they want to discuss with me. There is hardly any talk about my career, friends and life in general. We discuss those topics if I steer the conversation in that direction. If not, it's all talk about "why don't you get a transplant", "you're the person with the least hair in our family" and "does it bother you to have so little hair".

 

Does anyone else have this issue with their family members? I love my family but their constant talking about my scalp doesn't do much for my self-esteem.

[pkipling]

I fortunately was never the recipient of this, and even before my hair transplant my receding hairline wasn't so severe that it was ever a topic of conversation. Not to mention I did a great job of styling around it so that my hair loss was never that noticeable.

 

I have thought in recent years though about an uncle of mine who is almost completely bald. Even as a kid, I only knew him as a NW5 or so. I remember his bald head being the topic of conversation quite a bit when I was younger, and I wondered later if that ever bothered him. Then again, he instigated a lot of it. He was always the jokester and would always make comments about his shiny bald head to the kids and whatnot.

 

As for you and your situation, your best bet is to be very clear, upfront and honest with your family and tell them in a loving way, "It makes me really uncomfortable when we discuss my hair loss, and it would mean a lot to me if we could discuss other things about me and my life than that." So many of our problems in life come from a lack of communication, and I've found that being clear and direct in a kind and loving way is always the best approach.

 

I had a similar situation several years ago with my family in regards to my acting career. I also live on the west coast, and when I first moved here about 6 years ago, anytime I saw or spoke to my family back home in the south, their first (well intentioned) questions were always "How's acting going? Have you booked anything? When will we see you on tv?" These questions always came with the best of intentions, but it reached a point where I had to ask them to stop asking me so many questions. "When I book something, I'll tell you. ," I told them. Otherwise, I was constantly being put in a position where, depending on what had happened in my career lately, I had to say "No, I haven't" - and suddenly have to deal with all the insecurities and disappointments that are prevalent in anyone pursuing a career in the entertainment industry. But by talking to them about it, it actually made our conversations better and deeper. We cut past the nonsensical small talk. And when I do book a job or have a really great audition, I have something to share with them.

 

So yeah.... Communication is key. You'll probably grow closer because of it.

[MAW99]

I agree that communication is key. Good for you for sharing your feelings with your family.

 

It certainly doesn't bother me if little kids ask me about my head, or point out my baldness, because they don't mean any harm.

 

What made you decide to finally get a transplant?

[pkipling]

I agree that communication is key. Good for you for sharing your feelings with your family.

 

It certainly doesn't bother me if little kids ask me about my head, or point out my baldness, because they don't mean any harm.

 

What made you decide to finally get a transplant?

 

The main factor in me deciding to get a HT was simply learning about it and discovering that it was a viable option. For the several years that I had been dealing with my hairline slowly receding, I honestly didn't realize there was anything that could've been done about it. Once I found Dr. Mohebi and realized that this was a very viable option, it was a no-brainer for me. I did my research, looked at different doctors, felt like I was a good candidate, and ultimately decided that I was in good hands with Mohebi. It just felt right in my gut. The fact that my hair loss was really bothering me more and more with every year that passed made me gladly welcome the idea of a HT with open arms.

[MAW99]

Sounds like you made the right choice.