altair...
Depression is a nasty thing...it affects your work/productivity, personal life, and most importantly affects those around you.
Write down a set of goals for yourself. Lets say 1 year from now you want to have a ht...
First email/phone/visit (if possible)quality docs that can do your corrective ht. Alot of docs will work with you on price...tell them your story and let them know that you will be saving monthly to get your ht. Next, tighten the buckle a little...less eating out, more brown-bagging for lunch, no cable/satellite, no designer clothes. Go to public places like the park/beach instead of the amusement park or the movies. Have a garage sale or get on ebay and sell stuff that is in the closet/garage. Pick up a second job.
Inner peace and happiness for you and your family is too important to pass up...you cannot put a pricetag on this. Living your life thinking..."what if?" is a sure way to become bitter, depressed and resentful of those around you.
Good luck to you and feel free to email me anytime.