Baldness – is it a mind game!!!

[allineedzhair]

Hey guys,

I have been coming to this forum a lot lately, and I have just decided to join and share my story and express my thoughts and feelings.

Baldness – is it a mind game??

My hairline start receding when I was 20 or 21, back then I really didn’t care at all and never bothered myself with it. When I became 24 I realized my hair has thinned a lot and my hairline was really bad especially from the left side. So my mentality was either to have a good hair that I can style in fashion using hair gel and all or just buzz as it became somehow popular fashion with many people sporting that look. So I decided to buzz my hair with trimmer zero guard and I was pretty happy with it (even though it was clear my hairline was bad and im balding but I didn’t really care) I was pretty happy with the buzzed look and I didn’t see myself ever growing my hair again, I didn’t even notice how hair lost is driving people crazy because I never even bothered to search or read anything online about it, at some point like 4 years ago I was actually grateful that my hair thinned so that I had the chance to try and sport the bald/buzzed look which I really liked. I can say that I was in a peaceful state of mind; I thought I looked better with that new style.

however, I had to quit my job and while I was looking for a new job I had a lot of extra time that I spent online, I still don’t remember how it all started but I started to ready some peoples view on getting bald and the depression they were in, how women prefer men with hair over bald people, how people were making fun online of a lot of bald people, then I started reading the hair loss forums (almost all online famous online forums related to that topic), I saw how many people look at their situation and the isolation and depression they face because of baldness and the energies they spend on their mission to get their hair back even if that means taking the risk of using medications that might affect their sex drive. It was kind of shocking at the beginning but after 4-5 years of buzzing my hair regularly (and enjoying that back then) my point of view started to change. Something changed inside of me and the way I view my baldness, I started to view myself in a different way, I started to see myself ugly, and hate the way I look, having my hair back became an obsession, I even dream about it every night. I really became so depressed, that the first thing I notice about any guy I see is his hair.

I sometimes ask myself, WTH happened to me, I’m still the same dude with the same style I had for the last 4-5 years and all people got used to me this way anyways (in fact they say the buzzed hair “even with no hairline” looks good on me). I am in a dilemma now as my self esteem is becoming very low and it’s ruining my life.

I want to go for an HT but I don’t want to take medicines, I am usually so sensitive to medicines and even Tylenol gives me sides sometimes, so there is no way in hell I would take something that could have any possible sexual effect, and without meds I’m not sure if I should go with an HT since I might as well end up being nw6 or 7.

Now I look at some of my bald friends who are happy with being bald and so confidence about it (just like I was) and wonder if baldness is a mind game? Is something in our head that we can live “happily” with it or just make it ruin our life? The problem is we can’t control our emotions and they way our brain is set to think.

I look now at some HT doctors who are bald themselves and wonder how can they live with being balds with all the money they got and the techniques they know to beat baldness? They are HT doctors who are not bothered by their baldness.

I wish I can set my mind back to the way it was 2 years ago. It’s really ironic how my hair loss did not bother me when I was in my mid 20s (25 is when I started shaving) and now it’s driving me crazy in my 30s (I’m 30 now).

[MTL30]

yeah it's funny how some HT doctors have hairloss and do nothing about it... wonder why?

[sk07]

I understand you completly, I was like that too when i was in my mid 20s i was shaving and I thought when I turn 30 it wont bother me that much but dear how wrong was I..it bothers me now more than it did back in my mid 20s...

is it normal? some psychological screw up happened?

can someone shed some light on this, logically you would think the older you get the more accepting it will become, it wasnt the case with me

[bonkerstonker]

It's not a mind game it's just a human instinct and common sense to be upset about losing anything in life and the fact of the matter is people with hair look better due to greater number of options you have with hair you can even shave it all off to appear to be bald if you want when you're actually bald it's not a choice it's forced upon you. Nobody would like to eat McDonald's for the rest of their lives but now and again its great.

[BadBeat]

Here's the thing. You say you like the look of your buzz cut. If you decide to go down the HT road, you'll likely have to forever lose the buzz cut. It's possible that if you did a FUE procedure you might still be able to keep it pretty short without seeing the scarring. If I were you, I'd first work on the inner turmoil you have and try to get less obsessed with your hair (MUCH easier said than done!).

 

There are some good threads in here that show guys who had an FUE procedure done with the intention of always buzzing their head. They were mostly concerned about coverage and not density. They had the HT create a hairline that framed their face nicely. Maybe that's what your goal should be if you decide to get an HT.