ElectraGlide71

Hey Dewayne Good for you, man. Good for you. I've always heard and read that the best transplants are the ones you can't TELL are transplants. As the "eye drifters" go, the ones that sit there and stare...noticing something different, looking for some kind of flaw or something that just looks unnatural or something not quite right. And I think we all know, all TOO well, what it feels like to constantly obsess over how we look, while we're still bald, or the ones getting used to having a transplant, and just being overly conscious of people staring, to see if they can call you out and say "Ha! I can tell that's a transplant!" I know a guy that wears a hair system, and he does look better, but he's miserable and just as overly conscious about it as he was before he got it. Because he says he'll meet people, and while talking to them, his eyes are planted on their eyes, which are looking up at his hair, maybe trying to figure out "what's wrong with this picture?" He's kind of mad at himself for jumping the gun and going with a hair system, as he says he's spent more money on it than he ever thought, and hasn't gotten the real relief and confidence he thought he would. Dewayne, I look forward to one day, being able to go out into public, or having a one on one meeting with someone, without wearing a hat, and them not even really looking twice at my head...but more my eyes and the real topic being discussed. And a bald head being the problem and the thing to obsess over...if the problem is eliminated, then there's nothing to obsess over...leaving your train of thought open to so many other things. That's what I long for. And happy you're getting that feeling and satisfaction from it. I'm happy for ya.

Hey Dewayne and Ja-Man Thanks for your input. You know Dewayne, if I remember right, when I first signed up on this forum, the contest for the free hair transplant was still going on. I submitted a response, but I was actually too late getting it in. Had I only known. I did look at the link to the Vegas doctor you recommended. Any information like this is extremely helpful. I actually did learn that two of the coalition doctors have their practice in a city about an hour away from me. I think what these surgeons do by helping ones with free transplants is a truly wonderful and selfless gift to offer to ones that just aren't in the position to get this procedure done otherwise. I don't know if my situation or story is any more or less deserving of a gift like this, than anyone else around here that is looking into hair transplantation. I've never been one to ask for charity, but I will say that any extra help I could receive in this area would not go unnoticed. Hell, I could see myself washing their cars, trimming their bushes, singing at their parties forever, just as some kind of payback! HA HA! And Ja-Man...yeah, you're right. I've been real damned hard on myself because of my hair loss. And though all of this hasn't happened overnight, it almost feels like it in a way, as I can see the differences in the quality of life I once lived and live now, and how the daily beating and obsession over this has just worn me down. There's a condition we can let ourselves suffer from...where, if things seem to be so bad for so long, we get accustomed and conditioned to it. But when it's discovered that the light at the end of the tunnel ISN'T a freight train coming at us, we still stand on the tracks, thinking or maybe hoping that it is. It's a learned hopelessness of maybe knowing, but definitely thinking things aren't going to get any better for us. To answer a few of your questions...no, I don't shave my head. It just doesn't FIT me. And I'd rather have some hair and wear a hat, than have NO hair, where I would still always wear a hat. And you're absolutely right where confidence comes into play. But, I will say that there have been numerous times over the last several years, that I've met a sweet and pretty girl. And after a few dates and things seemed to be going well, then it came that time..."where the hat came off". And after that moment, the interest on her part just sort of vanished, and I'd never hear from her again. Now, keep in mind, by her attitude, this isn't a girl I would want to be with in the first place. If the lack of hair was more important to her than my sense of humor and personality, then to hell with her. But, I've had to say that about a lot of women...as that has been a pretty common scenario. And the desire to go out, or be in public, is almost a dreaded task nowadays,as I almost know the drill. I show up someplace alone, maybe talk with some people, maybe flirt with or strike up a conversation with a girl...but to no end, leaving by myself with no phone numbers or prospects with future contact. Like the learned hopelessness, that happens to you enough times, it's a little hard not to predict how the evening will probably turn out. And though I don't perform music, I do love live music, and love to go watch my friends perform. And maybe the attitude I've somewhat unknowingly taken on, has made me a little unapproachable in one's eyes when I'm out. Granted Ja-Man...I can still be a funny and charming guy, without really having to put on an act. I just like people, and I like talking to them. That's also how I've managed to meet other men with my problem, and be able to have a good talk with them about where they stand and how they feel about themselves. And the good that comes out of that, is that they've met someone that knows exactly how they feel, and I can hear from and talk to one more person in my situation. And Ja-man, you're absolutely right. A transplant will not change or fix ALL of the problems and feeling in my life. I know it's not a cure-all for the things I've missed out on, and the outlook on life I've managed to acquire. But, I know myself enough to know that...it would be a HUGE jolt in the arm of morale and some hope, knowing that things are moving in the direction to make me feel somewhat better about myself, than just headed down that road where it will still do nothing but get worse. And these improvements...I really owe it to myself. But, I owe it do my daughter as well. I have this beautiful, intellectually gifted, charming 11 year old daughter...that worships her dad, thinks I'm the coolest guy around and is still the number one man in her life. We're best buds and soulmates, and she asks me for help and advice in a lot of areas that you think she would ask her mom. I'm at my best when she's around, and I dare not let her see how this has affected me when she comes to stay with me or when we talk on the phone. Makes me sound like somewhat of a hypocrite, but I do what's best for her FIRST. And rise to the occasion when she needs "cool, calm, collected and bulletproof dad" to get her through a problem or a crisis that 11 year old girls go through. She's the sunshine of my cloudiest of days, and I always want her to have a dad that she can be proud of...look at the neat things her dad does for a living, the talents I can showcase, a dad she can be proud of, but a dad that is ALWAYS going to be there for her. And I'd like to be on top of my game a little more than what I am. I will share one more thing with you, and then I'll shut up. I don't mean to keep writing NOVELS on this post. But all of you understand, and I appreciate you taking the time to respond, offer your experience, ideas and advice. This was an experience that really opened up my eyes as to how much my hair loss has affected me, after looking back on it. Several weeks back, I suffered an injury at work. I was struck in the head by a loose piece of overhead equipment that should not have come loose. It blindsided me, hit me on the head, and knocked me unconscious. I don't know how long I was out, but when I came to, a coworker was leaning over me. No one saw how I fell, so they were worried I might've hurt my neck or my back in the fall. Though my head was bleeding, I had somehow reached up and put my cap back on. When the paramedics showed up, they took off my cap and did what they needed to to control the bleeding. And they made me lie very still, as they wanted to put me in a neck brace and strap me to a hard board, as a precaution. And as out of it as I was, as much as I felt myself going into shock, the one thought I remember, while looking up at all of my coworkers was, "Oh crap, all my coworkers are seeing me without my hat on." Even at the emergency room, while I had come to and was waiting on a CT scan and x-rays, I adjusted my cap and put it back on my head, as I didn't want anyone in there to see me like that. I wound up suffering a good concussion from that accident, along with some bad back and neck strain. And I now have another scar on my head, that's not hidden by any hair. I found I had suffered another cut more on the side of my head, where I had hair, that did bleed, but wasn't near as bad. I feel very lucky that I wasn't hurt much worse than what I could've been. In fact, though not one hundred percent, I get to go back to work tomorrow, to do at least some light duty to start. And that's when I looked at all of this, thinking how I was injured, bleeding, possibly hurt worse than what I was, and what I was worried about more than anything was my friends and coworkers seeing my bald head. That's when I told myself, "Man, you have got to get a grip on this thing...and maybe it's time to look into WHATEVER you can do to remove this albatross from your neck." Ja-Man, that's the extent of the anxiety I've taken on and been battling, seeing how this has affected me that much. Granted, I've suffered from depression and anxiety from my late teens, but I learned how to keep a handle on it to live a normal life. But after that...it was a good wake-up call. That's when I came back to this site, and started reading everyone's posts and educating myself again. And after reading around here, ya know what? I decided I would like to be one of the success stories...the before and after guy, that's around to talk to men and women that are in the same position I'm in NOW, and do what I can to help them. I get a high from helping people, be it recovering alcoholics and addicts, to...whoever is just having a problem that maybe I can offer my experience, strength, and hope to. It would be a very cool thing, a few years down the road, to be on this site and just be another voice of encuragement. I would feel nothing but obligated and grateful. I'm just hoping it can turn out like that. Damn sure gonna try. Thanks again, y'all.

Hey Dewayne, I can certainly relate to your situation a lot. And what you and elchinoboss are things that I just kind of need to hear from other members on this board. Just some realizations of hair loss has just gotten the best of me lately, and that's why it helps. Dewayne, I too had to change career paths, after doing one for so long. I started working as a professional actor and musician when I was ten years old. I continued this all through my teens, into my mid twenties. Up to that point, and more as an adult, I had starred in a few tv shows, a couple of movies. And even though I hated the whole stigma of it, I got approached for a few modeling jobs. I didn't think I was all that good looking in an arrogant or egotistical sense. Granted, I had some confidence, but that's where I simply drew the line. The ego trip just wasn't me and was never my style. And because of what they paid, I did the few modeling jobs I got called for. I toured the country, performed as a regular with a band in Las Vegas. And though I didn't live in a city where there was a great outlet for a lot of acting in films and whatnot, I still did what I could. On the side, I'd do public speaking, working with and helping recovering alcoholics and drug addicts, as well as children with alcoholic and drug addicted parents. In the process of all of that singing and performing, I managed to get afflicted with chemical dependency...which I overcame. And I simply wanted to help anyone I possibly could. I was just a very outgoing and caring person that loved to entertain people, and help them along the way. At 24, I got married. We had a daughter, but I acquired a stepdaughter as well. And though I continued to pursue music and acting, I had to have that "real job" to pay the bills. And granted, despite all I had done, it's real damn hard to make a good living in the entertainment business. But I was lucky to have an agent and people that believed in me, and backed me and tried to find projects for me. By the time I was 27, I noticed that my hairline was starting to thin and recede a bit. And I paniced. And it ate at me and I just dwelled and dwelled on it. But, I didn't do anything, because I guess I just didn't think it would get any worse. But it did... At 31, my wife and I divorced, which took a huge toll on me. Not to mention, at this point, my hair loss had gotten worse. And in the kindest way my agent knew how, she told my I really didn't have a "look" anymore that she could really sell to any company making movies. After all, looks ARE everything in that business. And as much as I hated it, I soon found myself wearing a hat everytime I performed. My hair loss was bad enough that people would comment on it, joke about it...not knowing how much it had already affected me so greatly emotionally. I'm 37 now. I don't work with people anymore. My social anxiety has crippled me to the point that I don't perform music anymore...not even for fun. I play at home, but that's it. I've pretty much become a social recluse. In the six years since my divorce, I haven't had one serious girlfriend. And it hasn't been for lack of trying. I just had to find out the harsh, cold way that a lot of women really prefer men with hair. I work a job where I can wear a hat all the time, and I don't have to deal with people. Granted, it pays the bills, turned out to be a better job than I first expected...but I never though I would see myself working in a place where I wasn't working with or helping people in some way...or entertaining them. I never thought that hair loss would take such a toll on me that it would strip me of so much of my self esteem and confidence, that not only would I not deal with people, but I would go out of my way to avoid them. And as the hair loss has gotten worse, my overall concern for the rest of my health has dwindled as well. I simply don't care of myself like I should physically..because I simply don't care enough at this point. You will never see me in public without a hat, and to the dread of my family, they know I will not participate in any public function where I can't wear a hat. I even wear a cap sometimes when I'm at home. If I go water the grass, I put on a hat. Never thought I'd own this many damn hats. And meanwhile, there are some people out there asking about me, wondering what happened to me, what I'm doing, and why I'm not performing in public anymore. I don't mean for this to sound like a "poor me" sob story. But, it's just the simple truth of how hair loss has affected me, and a life I'm living which is far different than the one I thought I'd be living...or COULD be living. I'm still at the point of trying to figure out how I could fund a first transplant, while figuring out the second one. I know I'm not going to look like when I did when I was in my early 20's, but that doesn't matter. Would just be nice to have a head of hair that I could have the confidence again to go out into public without wearing a damned hat! So, while the depression and anxiety has just gotten worse as time has gone on, the desperation gets greater. I almost think if I could sell a kidney to take care of this problem...I'd damn near do it. And maybe I do sound somewhat shallow and vain by letting this get the best of me...but like some of you have said...what's wrong with simply wanting to look good, and have a look that you can take pride in? And the irony is, I now live in a city where there's a huge music scene with singers and songwriters' careers taking off from here. And a place where at least a few movies are always being made. LOL. Finally land somewhere to try and showcase what I really know and do best, yet I can't. Because as the looks go, I have nothing left to sell. So, rob a bank, sell a kidney, or pay a good 30 percent in finance charges, IF I could get the financing for a hair transplant? At this point, I'm thinking kidney. HA! HA!

Hey y'all. I've been bouncing around the forum, reading different posts, from members who are in all different stages of hair restoration. Be it waiting on a transplant to the members who have had multiple transplants and have had "their hair back" for some time. But, when the topic of "change your life" comes up, I'd be curious to hear more about how much you were affected before your transplant. How much, to what degree mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, and any other area that your hair loss TRULY affected you, and how it changed areas of your life, if it changed any at all? The reason I ask this is, my hair loss has affected me enormously, in about every possible area. How I live, the quality of life I have, and my overall outlook and attitude towards life. I've been told I pretty much talk, sound,and act like an old man. And they're right. I pretty much feel like an old man just waiting around to die. And I'm only 37 yrs old. And when I look in the mirror, what I see just pretty much confirms that. It's sad to think that hair loss could take such a toll on us and our own perception of ourselves, but also how others view and treat men with this problem. Maybe I'm sounding a bit extreme...a bit vain and a bit shallow. That I won't argue. I've taken it hard, as I've lived most of my life doing work that largely depended on my looks. Due to that, a lot of the offers and opportunities are gone, which has made me lose interest and the pure love and enjoyment of what I once did, as opposed to what I do now. And I sure don't do the living that I once did, and that's a damn shame. And please don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying I have it any worse than anyone around here. I've apparently just taken it a lot worse, and just haven't been able to cope. I've been looking into hair restoration again, weighing my options and seeing how I could financially swing a transplant, and do what I can to not be that old old man anymore. In a way all of this has become somewhat of an obsession for me. In the last seven years, I've managed to make myself a field study in social situations. As well as study and observe other men with hair loss, talk with them, and find out how much their lives had changed due to their hair loss. And their stories were pretty much the same, but to varying degrees. That's why it's both frustrating and inspiring to read posts on this forum. It's sad that I was once a very outgoing person with the love and ability to entertain and make people happy in what I did. And now I'm a social recluse, that works a job because I don't have to care about what I look like and I can wear a hat ALL the time. I'm at an age where I should be out there living life to it's fullest. And very simply, I'm just existing more than I'm living. I could go on and on and on. But, I'd be more interested in hearing more from all of you, just because I know all of you can relate to what I'm saying and feeling in one form or another. So, if y'all don't mind sharin some more...then please do. It'll benefit me, as well as other members of this forum...maybe new ones like me. It's good to hear stories where the light at the end of the tunnel ain't a freight train coming at ya. Because for me, it's been a train for a good while. Thanks so much for anything you have to say or share.

Very impressive surgery approach with the pictures to prove the results. I'm envious, if not downright jealous. Electraglide

Hey guys. I appreciate all of your input. When I first came around in December, the contest for the free transplant had just ended. And I noticed there hasn't been another one since. I've never won anything in my life, but I told myself that there was nothing I wanted to win more than the next contest. Well...winning the lottery wouldn't hurt a bit either. HTB, thanks for your contribution. You are all right. There is an inner strength that can be built to get beyond and past hair loss. We all know that looks don't make up the person. As cliched as it sounds, it really is what's on the inside that matters. There is a lot of this that I'm still getting used to, and just trying to cope with. Plus, things I worry about that I never thought I would worry about, nor did I think something such as hair loss could consume my every thought and make me change my life the way it has. And I think a lot of it has to do with how I grew up, what I did for a living, how I helped people in my spare time, and how people used to look at me and treat me. I can say that since my baldness has progressed, I can tell the way I get approached or addressed by some people. And when it comes to old friends and family, if I don't get the look of pity, I just get made fun of. I went through a bad divorce a few years back. And I pretty much got raked over the coals by my ex-wife. But at the same time, I kind of let her, as I wanted to make sure that my daughters had what they needed, since they were going to be living with her. Due to illness, a surgery, and a burglarly that robbed me of just about every valid possession I had, I had no choice but to file for bankruptcy. So, at this point, I couldn't get a decent credit card or financed if I wanted to. And I wouldn't mind going into debt for the sake of something I feel is worth the money. I know transplant surgery can't fix all my problems, but I know it would give me back some of the self-esteem and self-confidence I once had, that I just can't be able to find these days. And maybe a part of me has stopped looking. At least the transplant work would be a kick in the ass to work on those other areas. And yeah, we do take a lot of these things for granted, until we lose them. I can definitely see how I would be a better person down the line, as I know how it feels to be treated with a full head of hair, and how it feels to be treated now. I've worked all my life with people in on form or another. So, it's hard to imagine that the social phobias I've developed from this have led me to a point of downright seclusion. I have a job where I can go and work by myself most times. I don't have to talk to people, or be paranoid or over-conscious of them looking at me. And, I do enjoy the job. But I know I've limited myself. I guess you can understand the desperation as to why I'd stoop to the point of putting myself in the role of a guinea pig. Just shear desperation. I've always pretty much worked for the things I've gotten, and I'm not real big on asking for handouts. Hell, I'd rather be the guy helping someone else out. But, it's times like this I wish a rich relative would show up out of the blue. lol Well, my hat collection has gotten to a decent size, and you'll never see me in public without one on. And you'll never see me take it off either...for anyone. Thanks again for you kind advice and words. Guess I'll keep pushing on, hoping some kind of break or something comes along. Anything that offers just a little bit of hope. And should things change for me for the better, I DO know that this time spent would certainly NOT be taken for granted. I've already learned a lot from it. Hopefully someday, I can share a little experience, strength, and hope with someone in the same position I am. Thanks again, guys.

Hi there. I found this site a few months ago and am very glad I did. I'm happy for all of the people on here with success stories and pictures of their hair transplant surgeries, not to mention all of the info on other hair loss options...most of which I've tried with no success. Here is what I want to know from the doctors of this forum. I know every doctor goes through years of school, med school, etc... At some point they decide which area they want to specialize in. And there are those that decide on plastic surgery, and furthermore, their specialty being in hair loss and transplant surgery. Now, I know at some point, all of these doctors are students, and have to learn from the more experienced doctors how the hair transplant procedures are done. The students have to be taught, meaning there has to be some hands-on experience and surgery involved. What I want to know is--are there universities or schools that teach this, that need volunteers for the advanced students to try and perfect their techniques on. I ask this, as I am pretty much at the point where I'd be more than happy to be a guinea pig in exchange for transplant surgery. My desperation and depression, my quality of life, or there lack of, has pushed me to the point where I'd almost rather have a bad transplant job than the continuation of losing my hair and being in the bald state I am now. Seeing how because of my condition, I've managed to shut out many facets of my life, and have taken on lesser paying jobs, just so I don't have to face people or the embarrassment of showing the world how bad and diseased I look by going bald. Because of this, I know I'd never be able to pay for transplantion surgery, even though I've consulted with a major transplant organization. Apparently, I have a superb donor area. The only thing I lack is the financial means for the procedure. I live in Texas. So, if there are any physicians that moderate, visit, or contribute to this site that has any advice or outlets for me in this area, your information would be greatly appreciated. At this point, life as I pretty much know it is over. So, to be someone's subject or guinea pig, at this point, would be a risk worth taking where everyone comes out a winner. Thanks for your time. I can even be contacted personally at texasbillyaustin@yahoo.com. ElectraGlide71

Hi there. I found this site a few months ago and am very glad I did. I'm happy for all of the people on here with success stories and pictures of their hair transplant surgeries, not to mention all of the info on other hair loss options...most of which I've tried with no success. Here is what I want to know from the doctors of this forum. I know every doctor goes through years of school, med school, etc... At some point they decide which area they want to specialize in. And there are those that decide on plastic surgery, and furthermore, their specialty being in hair loss and transplant surgery. Now, I know at some point, all of these doctors are students, and have to learn from the more experienced doctors how the hair transplant procedures are done. The students have to be taught, meaning there has to be some hands-on experience and surgery involved. What I want to know is--are there universities or schools that teach this, that need volunteers for the advanced students to try and perfect their techniques on. I ask this, as I am pretty much at the point where I'd be more than happy to be a guinea pig in exchange for transplant surgery. My desperation and depression, my quality of life, or there lack of, has pushed me to the point where I'd almost rather have a bad transplant job than the continuation of losing my hair and being in the bald state I am now. Seeing how because of my condition, I've managed to shut out many facets of my life, and have taken on lesser paying jobs, just so I don't have to face people or the embarrassment of showing the world how bad and diseased I look by going bald. Because of this, I know I'd never be able to pay for transplantion surgery, even though I've consulted with a major transplant organization. Apparently, I have a superb donor area. The only thing I lack is the financial means for the procedure. I live in Texas. So, if there are any physicians that moderate, visit, or contribute to this site that has any advice or outlets for me in this area, your information would be greatly appreciated. At this point, life as I pretty much know it is over. So, to be someone's subject or guinea pig, at this point, would be a risk worth taking where everyone comes out a winner. Thanks for your time. I can even be contacted personally at texasbillyaustin@yahoo.com. ElectraGlide71