*SERIOUS* problems on our Forum

[Melvin- Admin]

It’s become clear to me that this forum is being poisoned by a few individuals. When I joined this forum over 5 years ago it was about uplifting one another, giving each other hope and encouragement.

Within the last two years it’s become a place where a handful of anxious, obsessive and compulsive guys come to complain and poison otherwise healthy and happy individuals. 

I have had at least a few individuals ask me to delete their accounts and threads because of all the negativity. It saddens me to see the state of affair of this forum. A place where I felt a brotherhood, a place where we all knew the struggle and just wanted improvements and to regain what we lost. Now it’s a place of negativity and despair. 

A healthy community is like a garden, in order to keep it healthy you have to pull a few weeds. The saying a few bad apples spoils a bunch is true. I can’t do this on my own I need your guys help! 

I know for a fact certain individuals are targeting healthy and happy individuals to discourage them about their results via PM. If this happens to any of you, please let me know. These people do not have your best interest at heart, they’re simply using you as a tool for extortion, once they get what they want, you’ll never hear from them again. I’ve seen this too many times to count. 

 My goal is to get us back to the community that once helped @Sanjar41 get repaired, we rallied behind him and showed our support and encouragement. We didn’t bring him down, and make him feel even worse. He was utterly and completely botched too, a true botch job. 

This is what this forum is all about, not negativity for personal gain!

 

 

 

[Helios]

It’s not just this forum Melvin. Myself and other users who previously used others forums a few years ago have found that there is so much negativity on the forums and the brotherhood that existed is now almost non existant. I don’t know what happened.

[Melvin- Admin]

14 minutes ago, Helios said:

It’s not just this forum Melvin. Myself and other users who previously used others forums a few years ago have found that there is so much negativity on the forums and the brotherhood that existed is now almost non existant. I don’t know what happened.

We’re not like any other forum though. Our community is one of a kind. I know it sounds biased coming from me, but trust me I used to belong to all the forums, but this one was the BEST for hair transplants. Not only that, but it was ran by patients.

Other forums are ran by unknown guys who don’t ever post, or show their face. We’ve been held at a higher standard. That’s why guys trust us, we walk the walk.  But lately it’s been a real problem dealing with this negativity. I need your guys help. We need to work together as a community because that’s what we are!

[LaserCap]

Negativity is everywhere in the world.  Forgive them and move on.  Otherwise you are tied to them.

[Aftermath]

One of the problems imo is there’s too many people with agendas

[Melvin- Admin]

Just now, LaserCap said:

Negativity is everywhere in the world.  Forgive them and move on.  Otherwise you are tied to them.

We can’t, if we do that they’ll take over. Would you say this about crime in your neighborhood? No, it has to he dealt with. 

A community is like a garden, if you let a few weeds grow, pretty soon the garden will become full of weeds and no longer be a garden. In order to flourish, we have to keep our garden healthy.

[Melvin- Admin]

Just now, Aftermath said:

One of the problems imo is there’s too many people with agendas

Yes dead on mate. These guys have agendas for their personal gain. We can’t have that, we need to keep a healthy objective community. You’re definitely a quality poster that helps keep us neutral. Thanks for that.

[LaserCap]

8 minutes ago, Melvin-Moderator said:

We can’t, if we do that they’ll take over. Would you say this about crime in your neighborhood? No, it has to he dealt with. 

A community is like a garden, if you let a few weeds grow, pretty soon the garden will become full of weeds and no longer be a garden. In order to flourish, we have to keep our garden healthy.

Time to clean house? How do you propose to deal with the issue? Delete them? Castigate? Issue warnings?

We have a very wise and well informed group of moderators. Perhaps it's time to call out everyone.  Moderators do have the right to modify or even delete posts they feel are of no value.  For one, I would like to help in any way I can.

[Melvin- Admin]

3 minutes ago, LaserCap said:

Time to clean house? How do you propose to deal with the issue? Delete them? Castigate? Issue warnings?

We have a very wise and well informed group of moderators. Perhaps it's time to call out everyone.  Moderators do have the right to modify or even delete posts they feel are of no value.  For one, I would like to help in any way I can.

I do feel it’s time to pull a few bad weeds. For one, agenda posting. If you guys see a new poster that all of a sudden starts posting on a bunch of topics related to any particular clinic report it. 

Second, if any of you guys are posting your journey and you a receive a pm by someone with an axe to grind, report it. 

I want to make it clear that we stand behind all patients. Anyone is free to be unhappy with their personal results. However, if they start trying to bring others down, this is poisoning our well. This will jot be tolerated. If you guys have any information on this pm me thanks. 

I want to see our community flourish and help guys out there, that were once like me. If guys are wanting to delete their threads because of negativity, it hurts all of us. This forum is the best tool for researching, if guys stop posting we all suffer. Keep that in mind guys.

[BjornBorg]

A few points that come to mind:

1. HTs are becoming known to more and more people. With the general tone that is on the internet (especially Twitter) obviously a few of those young keyboard warriors will unfortunately find their way here. And you'll notice just one of them more than you will notice 9 decent and polite people.

2. I know you as a mod will have to get involved in those fiercer debates but for a casual user like myself who's here to view results and discuss with kind and heplful people there really isn't a poisonous environment here. I am honest, I feel none of it. 19 out of 20 threads are free from negativity.

3. Being helpful and kind does not equate lying and saying somebody had a good result when it's obvious he really didn't. I see a bit too much of that aswell. Kindly guiding someone with an average result to his next step will help more than giving fake compliments. In my humble opinion.

[Helios]

24 minutes ago, Melvin-Moderator said:

We’re not like any other forum though. Our community is one of a kind. I know it sounds biased coming from me, but trust me I used to belong to all the forums, but this one was the BEST for hair transplants. Not only that, but it was ran by patients.

Other forums are ran by unknown guys who don’t ever post, or show their face. We’ve been held at a higher standard. That’s why guys trust us, we walk the walk.  But lately it’s been a real problem dealing with this negativity. I need your guys help. We need to work together as a community because that’s what we are!

It might sound biased but I guess you’re just proud of the forum. Nothing wrong with that. It might very well be the best forum for hair transplants.

 

All I know for a fact is that there has been a mass increase in negativity in all the forums the last few years. There is no brotherhood on the forums including this one as there used to be. By all means I applaud you for trying to fight it. It flat out sucks. Everyone just attacks and insults each other. I hardly post any more because of it 

[Melvin- Admin]

1 minute ago, BjornBorg said:

A few points that come to mind:

1. HTs are becoming known to more and more people. With the general tone that is on the internet (especially Twitter) obviously a few of those young keyboard warriors will unfortunately find their way here. And you'll notice just one of them more than you will notice 9 decent and polite people.

2. I know you as a mod will have to get involved in those fiercer debates but for a casual user like myself who's here to view results and discuss with kind and heplful people there really isn't a poisonous environment here. I am honest, I feel none of it. 19 out of 20 threads are free from negativity.

3. Being helpful and kind does not equate lying and saying somebody had a good result when it's obvious he really didn't. I see a bit too much of that aswell. Kindly guiding someone with an average result to his next step will help more than giving fake compliments. In my humble opinion.

I agree 💯 with you. For the most part our community is good. Yes, I’m not saying lie to anyone about their results. Be honest, that’s how this community flourishes.

However, there’s a huge difference between someone giving their honest opinion and strategically pm’ng someone to incite unhappiness.

Let’s say someone has a disastrous result like Sanjar. Why on earth would we as a community pile on. Instead, we should rally behind him and try to give him the knowledge necessary to get it fixed. If this community is overran by guys screaming doom and gloom at 6 months no one will ever benefit.

Guys will be afraid to post, worst guys will start to believe that 6 months is long enough time to know the full results. If you don’t stop it now it will snowball.

[Melvin- Admin]

9 minutes ago, Helios said:

It might sound biased but I guess you’re just proud of the forum. Nothing wrong with that. It might very well be the best forum for hair transplants.

 

All I know for a fact is that there has been a mass increase in negativity in all the forums the last few years. There is no brotherhood on the forums including this one as there used to be. By all means I applaud you for trying to fight it. It flat out sucks. Everyone just attacks and insults each other. I hardly post any more because of it 

Yes, it’s the state of the internet I guess. I don’t want this forum to become like Twitter or the YouTube comment section. 

As long as I’m around I will do everything in my power to keep it a healthy place where we exchange knowledge and tips to regrow hair. End of the day, that’s why were all here.

[BjornBorg]

3 minutes ago, Melvin-Moderator said:

I agree 💯 with you. For the most part our community is good. Yes, I’m not saying lie to anyone about their results. Be honest, that’s how this community flourishes.

However, there’s a huge difference between someone giving their honest opinion and strategically pm’ng someone to incite unhappiness.

Let’s say someone has a disastrous result like Sanjar. Why on earth would we as a community pile on. Instead, we should rally behind him and try to give him the knowledge necessary to get it fixed. If this community is overran by guys screaming doom and gloom at 6 months no one will ever benefit.

Guys will be afraid to post, worst guys will start to believe that 6 months is long enough time to know the full results. If you don’t stop it now it will snowball.

Totally feel what you are saying, Melvin. I agree with LaserCap. Time to not only ban but also delete the posts of the absolute worst people.

I am not talking about those guys that had horrible results and their life quality lowered if they come here to vent. That is 100% their right. So no censorship here or silencing rightfully critical voices. I am talking about those with an agenda, as you said.

I think you and Bill are the right men to sort this out. Your efforts are what makes this place the best.

[Melvin- Admin]

7 minutes ago, BjornBorg said:

Totally feel what you are saying, Melvin. I agree with LaserCap. Time to not only ban but also delete the posts of the absolute worst people.

I am not talking about those guys that had horrible results and their life quality lowered if they come here to vent. That is 100% their right. So no censorship here or silencing rightfully critical voices. I am talking about those with an agenda, as you said.

I think you and Bill are the right men to sort this out. Your efforts are what makes this place the best.

🙏🏼 thanks I’m gonna do my best to keep this place objective, safe and real. Ulterior motives free. 

[LonelyGraft]

This is a tough one as this forum continuously preaches “free speech.” However, people like that one guy HT0146 or whatever is username was needs to be permanently banned. He has created over 6 accounts and obviously is here to just stir the pot and not add constructively.

 

i have a feeling a lot of these issues are stemming from erdogan results. We need to look at both sides of the coin here. The unhappy patients and erdogan himself. The doctors we approve here need to engage the community directly. We should be asking them to as long as they get our approval. If erdogan cannot publicly respond to a lot of these patient inquiries here then one of his two assistant doctors should on his behalf. Just doing so I feel can calm the storm a bit. It should be a privilege for doctors to be approved here and they need to follow OUR rules here not the other way around.

 

good discussion overall

[Grouchy]

46 minutes ago, jj51702 said:

If erdogan cannot publicly respond to a lot of these patient inquiries here then one of his two assistant doctors should on his behalf.

Realistically, what do people expect clinics to say about sub-par results that they don't already know?

It's usually the same response - not every procedure will be a success etc. There isn't much more they can say. A clinic isn't going to say that their standards have slipped.

If users are creating multiple accounts, it should be possible to ban their IP addresses from creating new accounts.
 

Edited August 12, 2019 by Grouchy

[Melvin- Admin]

1 minute ago, Grouchy said:

Realistically, what do people expect clinics to say that about sub-par results that that they don't already know?

It's usually the same response - not every procedure will be a success etc. There isn't much more they can say. A clinic isn't going to say that their standards have slipped.

If users are creating multiple accounts, it should be possible to ban their IP addresses from creating new accounts.
 

These guys are getting clever and using proxies. The only reason I know is because they use similar style email addresses and their posting says it all. 

Like I said I need your guys help. You see a fishy account report it. If someone is pm’ng you to spread their agenda report it. This is how we get rid of this plague.

[LonelyGraft]

30 minutes ago, Grouchy said:

Realistically, what do people expect clinics to say about sub-par results that they don't already know?

It's usually the same response - not every procedure will be a success etc. There isn't much more they can say. A clinic isn't going to say that their standards have slipped.

If users are creating multiple accounts, it should be possible to ban their IP addresses from creating new accounts.
 

I get it...words won’t alter results. But publicly addressing issues and even offering touch ups I FEEL can help put out some of the fire. Thing is, asmed has a dedicated marketing team and a number of patient coordinators yet none of them post here. Other clinics like hnw have several patient reps that live here and other forums and continuously address issues and check up on progress. Just thinking out loud

[Melvin- Admin]

1 minute ago, jj51702 said:

I get it...words won’t alter results. But publicly addressing issues and even offering touch ups I FEEL can help put out some of the fire. Thing is, asmed has a dedicated marketing team and a number of patient coordinators yet none of them post here. Other clinics like hnw have several patient reps that live here and other forums and continuously address issues and check up on progress. Just thinking out loud

Our forum has been overrun by trolls who can’t stop talking about one particular clinic. This is a HUGE disservice to those interested in other clinics. There’s already a thread asking about other clinics. 

I have already started pulling weeds. Frankly, I’ve been too nice. Enough is enough! I care too much about this community to let a few bad apples spoil everything and turn every discussion in to an agenda. That’s it! I’m done being nice. 

[paddyirishman]

I have not seen any negativity on this forum thankfully,  although their can be a difference of opinion but sometimes that can be good for all of us to consider things from a different angle, but this is a great forum Melvin , you should be very proud of which Im sure you are and their is lots and lots of positivity here which we can all build on together to ensure it remains a top forum to be part of.

...........  All the best ......

..............Paddy........

[Melvin- Admin]

4 minutes ago, Sergei76 said:

IF YOU WASNT FINANCIALLY GAINING YOU WOULD NOT BE BACKING THIS PARTICULAR CLINIC.

WHEN A CLINIC IS OFFERING A FREE TOUCH UP THEY ARE ADMITTING GUILT IN MY EYES TO A BOTCHED PROCEDURE.

OVER HARVEST DONAR ZONES, GRAFTS MISPLACED, HAIRLINE SHAPE TOO AGGRESSIVE THE LIST GOES ON.

KEEP SILENCING YOU ARE ONLY MAKING YOURSELF LOOK GUILTY BY DOING SO

 

HT04016 9th account. Continue making duplicate accounts. You’re showing your  true colors. It is you who is financially motivated trying to extort money not me!

[Melvin- Admin]

28 minutes ago, transplantedphil said:

just an idea but if you wanted to create a stronger brotherhood can I suggest you create a seperate section dedicated to repair patients? 

They are the most hesitant to post, other members look at their problems as merely being cosmetic (i.e. "this many grafts will fix it"), and have some of the hardest time finding information

It probably won't work given any patient without "such and such density" assumes they are victimised, and as I said such patients are usually hesitant to post in the first place, but speaking from personal experience understanding your rights, what was done to you, and finding a community to support you has been incredibly difficult here.

Whenever I saw a case where someone clearly needed help I usually sent them a private message and passed on some links with similar cases that I had found etc. So if there was a seperate section dedicated to such cases maybe such patients would ultimately be provided with better help

You hit the nail on the head. The issue is perception right. Let’s say a patient has an excellent procedure with great growth, but there expectations haven’t been met. These patients may consider themselves repair “victims”.

The problem is where do we draw the line, technically if they’re unhappy the procedure is considered a failure, even if the failure wasn’t the surgeons fault necessarily. 

In my opinion, repair patients are @Sanjar41 that is a true victim and repair patient. It would be great to have a place for patients like that, but there few and far in between. That said, we didn’t need to have a dedicated section to help him get repaired. Hopefully, now that some of the weeds have been pulled our forum will be a place of positivity and motivation as it once was. 

[Melvin- Admin]

4 minutes ago, transplantedphil said:

I guess a repair patient would technically be defined as any patient that requires further surgical attention (repaired) in order to achieve a natural appearance. 

I'd also recommend making @BeHappyand @LaserCap some type of independent advisors for the site given their vast knowledge and experience

I made the mistake of asking a former publisher here for help not understanding his exact role, and it did considerable damage to my mental health. I only say all this so that the motto of the site "created by and for patients" can be truly lived up to and any patient with any issue can be met with empathy and support

@BeHappy and @LaserCap are great so is @gillenator great resources of information. 

We could all learn a thing or two from behappy. After all he’s been through his outlook is to be applauded. 

My goal moving forward is to really make this the ultimate place for knowledge, motivation, I’m truly sorry for anything you’ve gone through. Things are changing and I want the community to know this. 

[Future Hair Doc]

I agree Melvin. I used to post under an old handle and have seen a lot of negativity recently. I think it's important to maintain the brotherhood and appreciate what you and the other moderators are doing. It's a tough and thankless job. Let us know how we can help