dating and hair loss

[bro]

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[Vasilius]

bro - google "Neil Strauss".

[flyby]

I think Than had some great points! He's a sharp kid.

 

There are way to many variables to this to nail down any exact formulas. While there are the obvious physical features of men and women which most will agree upon which define the extreme spectrums of beautiful and ugly (or should I say visually challenged), there are way to many variables in between. Both Men and Women are superficial at some level and being attracted physically is usually important with both. With that said, I do think that men are typically more superficial with regards to JUST looks. If you look around anywhere you'll definitely see a greater percentage of Beautiful women with less attractive men then you would see of Gorgous men with less then attractive women!

 

I do like the screen name bro though, because it makes the forum sound like a high school/college party. Hey Bro, What up bro

[bro]

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[bro]

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[bro]

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[Vasilius]

bro - Neil Strauss was NOT a celebrity when he wrote his book about dating supermodels. I've read "The Game". Have you? He became a celebrity BECAUSE of that book.

 

Yes, he was a talented writer who wrote for the New York Times and Rolling Stone. Yes, he was a ghost-writer for books by celebrities. But he was about as famous as you are. How many newspaper and magazine columnists would you recognize in a bar?

 

The fact that a 5'6" skinny bald guy wrote a best-selling book about dating supermodels brought the media attention that made him a celeb.

 

Building an exciting life, having a wide social circle and pursuing excellence makes you cool, interesting and confident. This, plus an understanding of women and attraction are what made Neil Strauss. Not money or fame.

[Vasilius]

Originally posted by bro:

Remember we are comparing regular guys here.

 

The point I'm trying to make is, simply this:

 

Don't be a "regular guy". You overcome short/bald by highlighting your best attributes and standing out in other areas.

 

This doesn't mean you should lie and make up a fake life of celebrities and rock stars. Even if that ever worked, what do you tell the girl once she gives you her number?

 

If you lead an exciting and fulfilling life, dress and groom yourself well, and don't send out insecure vibes by acting needy or like you don't belong there, you will stand out among the so-called "regular guys". You'll also have potential for successful long-term relationships with women.

 

But, if you have a dead-end job, never leave a 10-mile radius of your hometown, and sit in front of the TV or computer for 4 hours every night -- what the hell do you expect a woman to be interested in? Your DVD collection?

 

I'm a little worried about bro and some of the other members. This is the only reason I'm posting here. We're all here because we're trying to have and keep the best head of hair we can. But let's keep it in perspective.

 

Being short and bald isn't a life sentence of celibacy. Like I said, I'm 5'7" and started losing hair at age 17. By bro's philosophy I have no business whatsoever being happily married, much less to a gorgeous ex-cheerleader who graduated summa cum laude from university and makes six figures. I'm not ugly, but I would be by many womens' standard if I didn't take good care of myself. But I live a full, active life and don't live vicariously through the TV or Internet. I'm not saying I have a pile of 1st-edition philosophy books where a Tivo should be, but I get my ass moving toward my goals every day.

 

If you just want to wax pathetic about how cruel life is, that women like tall guys with thick luxurious hair and perfect teeth, go ahead. But that won't help anyone improve their situation. Ain't that what self-improvement is all about? Isn't hair restoration about improving your appearance and confidence?

 

Anyway, I wish bro and everyone else out there the best. I think I've said enough about this, hope some of it helps someone.

 

 

-Vasilius

[Chuckisduck]

I think Vasilius got it right on. Were you a biology or social science major by chance?

[Vasilius]

Thanks Chuck, but no. The psychology behind social interaction and sexuality is fascinating though, isn't it? :-)

[Dr. William Lindsey]

Hey, women have these same issues, but with different physical attributes.

 

Having done 3000 facelifts, I can tell you a variety of women of all different appearances, from hot to not, single to divorced, worry about just this type of thing.

 

Vasilius has correct insight.

 

Dr. Lindsey McLean VA

[bro]

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[bro]

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[Pale_Rider]

Come on men get real. It??s the self confidence that makes women go crazy, charm, good sense of humor and manly look(shave your head ). Women are naturally insecure(see how all of them will react if you make a harmless joke about their figure for example) so they are attracted to someone that is full of self confidence and being sure in himself. If you are miserable about your looks you send a negative vibe and they can sense that so you will be blown off in the start. Go to the gym, shave your heads, and get yourself a lady. Remember what Harry Callahan said: "Excuses are like assholes everybody has one".

[Chuckisduck]

That is pretty much true. Being tall and having full hair will always help, but you can get a good girl and be short and bald. I am 6'2" and most girls find me attractive, but 3 years ago I was really depressed after a long relationship that ended. I have had girls now tell me that I was hot, but they weren't interested cause I was all mopey then.

 

Pale Rider, I ended up asking my grandmother abotu the Croatian side of the family. The only thing she told me is that one of the families is from around Majagorie. I think its gonna be hard to find out anything more, and I think the reference to Majagorie is that she is very religious.

[Pale_Rider]

Originally posted by Chuckisduck:

That is pretty much true. Being tall and having full hair will always help, but you can get a good girl and be short and bald. I am 6'2" and most girls find me attractive, but 3 years ago I was really depressed after a long relationship that ended. I have had girls now tell me that I was hot, but they weren't interested cause I was all mopey then.

 

Pale Rider, I ended up asking my grandmother abotu the Croatian side of the family. The only thing she told me is that one of the families is from around Majagorie. I think its gonna be hard to find out anything more, and I think the reference to Majagorie is that she is very religious.

 

Of course it is true. If you suck with women without hair you will suck with hair, it is purely personality, and that can be changed if you have the will. There are shallow people everywhere but that is a sign that they have complex problems of their own and deeply inside they are miserable themselves, personally I don??t want to be with that kind of a woman. I am sorry about your relationship, I believe we are all been there but after a rain always comes the sun, that is mine philosophy.

 

About your origin your grandmother is probably from Medjugorje(Me?‘ugorje), today that is in Bosnia&Herzegovina, today the town is best known due to reported apparitions of the Blessed Virgin Mary which appeared to six Herzegovinian Croats since 24 June 1981, and is now visited by pilgrims from around the entire world as a shrine. You can read more here if you are interested http://medjugorje.hr.nt4.ims.h...spx?mv=4&qp=MToxOjE=

 

Movie "Gospa" was made about it, Martin Sheen played a major role, Michael York played too. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113200/

[bro]

sdfgsdfg

[Bill - Seemiller]

bro,

 

You've got a one track mind don't you?

 

I understand your argument loud and clear. And to an extent, I agree with you. I think it's harder for a short balding guy to get girls. After all, that's me! I'm 5 ft 6 and used to be bald. When I had a full head of hair before any thinning, I had no problem getting girls. But once I started losing my hair, I looked and felt terrible about myself.

 

So is it because I was going bald that I had a problem getting girls or was it because my confidence was shot. I'd suggest it was a combination of both.

 

Girls do like tall guys (generally speaking). But "tall" is relative to how tall the girl is. A lot of beautiful girls are only 5 ft 2 or 5 ft 3. I will still tall enough for a number of girls and thus, didn't have a problem. But just that most girls didn't want to date a guy shorter than them...I didn't want to date a girl taller than me.

 

Of course, I'm married now so getting girls is moot for me. But now that a lot of my hair and confidence is restored, I have faith that if I was single, I could find myself a pretty and nice girl.

 

I'm sure you can too!

 

Bill

[bro]

dsrstweretr

[thanatopsis_awry]

Bro, if what you are saying is true (and I'm not saying it isn't) the bigger question that follows is what are you going to do about it. Also, and I'm not saying I actually happen to disagree w/ you, but there is no benefit that I see in taking your stance as opposed to say Bill's, Vasilius', etc.....it isn't even that they disagree with you so much as that they recognize the validity that exists in your posts and take it a step further by trying to combat it with silver linings and solutions, IMO.

[Bill - Seemiller]

bro,

 

You are being way to absolute with your statements.

 

And if you want to speak in terms of absolutes, you are wrong.

 

If you are going to claim that short men have problems finding women, then you are calling me a liar.

 

The point is, that you can't conclude an absolute "truth" as you call it when it comes to women's interests. That's like women saying that all guys want is one thing. Though it may be true in many cases, it's not always true.

 

If you are having a hard time finding women, I'm sorry. But it sounds like you need a boost in your self-confidence, whether you have hair or not.

 

Good luck

 

Bill

[Vasilius]

For those joining this thread for the first time, I'll catch you up with this quick synopsis (please note that I am paraphrasing):

 

dhoose75: I went on a blind date with a girl 4 yrs older who'd had kids, but she wasn't into me and I think it's because I had a slightly receded hairline. Then I got my hairline restored and BAM she's on my jock. She wasn't even that hot and did I mention she's older with kids? What the hell? It must be that 1300 graft HT, not seeing me in a confident state and surrounded by friends that made me more attractive. Women are shallow.

 

everyone else: Yeah, women can be superficial when it comes to hair loss. Damn, that sucks.

 

bro: Women only want tall guys with full heads of hair. Short and bald guys have 00 chance, they all die as virgins unless they're rich and famous.

 

everyone else: People can be superficial, not just women. Bald guys can still meet women though.

 

bro: No way in hell. Short and bald guys are screwed, period.

 

me (Vasilius): Women will go for a short bald guy who is socially adept and at the top of his game. Looks matter, but short/bald guys can be with women. They just have to be interesting and confident.

 

everyone else: That makes sense.

 

bro: No effing way! You are WRONG WRONG WRONG!

 

thanatopsis_awry & vasilius: Looks matter, but develop your talents and become an awesome dude and looks won't matter as much.

 

bro: LIES! Height and hair are everything!

 

Bill: I feel your pain bro, but it's not an absolute black/white standard. I'm living proof.

 

bro: LALALALA LA LA, I can't hear you!

 

 

I guess we're done here! Bro, no hard feelings, but jeeeez Napoleon, lighten up!

 

 

-Vasilius

[bro]

sdsdfgd

[Vasilius]

Bro - we're not "up against" you. We're not here to insult you or beat you up. You are one of us, and we are trying to widen your perspective because of this:

 

Originally posted by bro:

There is absolutely no question that hair loss for me has changed my life from being able to get a few dates every now and then and maybe a girlfriend every year, to basically zero. I did start going bald when I was 19 and at the time had a girlfriend. She immediately broke up with me. Since then I have had like two dates, I am now 50.

 

This is the reason, the ONLY reason that I have addressed you in this thread. I can't speak for the others, but I believe we're all here to support YOU, just not your dogmatic point of view.

 

Whether you realize it or not, we're trying to help you bro. We're guys who lost some or all of our hair and still managed to find happiness with women. We're trying to show you that you don't have to go another 30 years with only two dates. But it's all for naught if you won't even consider what we are saying.

 

Look at it this way:

If you come to a raging river, and ask 2 men if it's possible to cross it, whom do you believe? The man standing at the riverbank who says "It's hopeless," or the man on the other side who says, "I just crossed it"?

 

I'm not here to prove a point or show you up, and I'm not going to insult you. I respect you as a man and you are entitled to believe what you will.

 

Originally posted by bro:

I went from being a One to being a Zero when my hair loss began.

 

But as long as you believe that you're a Zero, you're right.

 

And if you can't read this with an open mind, if you just continue to stubbornly refute it all outright, then there's no point in arguing about it anymore.

 

Best wishes,

-Vasilius

[bro]

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