Jamie Foxx and the "Hair Matrix"

[gimmehair]

While browsing the web i found a pretty interesting article. Dunno if it's real or fake but thought id come share it with you wondaful guys on the forum.......

 

 

The Hair Matrix: Jamie Foxx's Mysterious Hair Line

 

I've had my suspicions. But after over a year of speculation, the Academy Award winning actor and comedian Jamie Foxx admits to SST that he underwent experimental hair cloning and transplantation at Duam Duam Corporation's Stem Cell Research Institute in Compton, California. The Duam Duam Corporation is the world's largest producer of hair weaves and wigs.

 

Korean Doctor Joo-chan Gimhae used his patented Gimhae Method which grows hair follicular stem cells obtained from the patient in culture and then implants the cells into the scalp where they root and begin to grow.

 

This explains the mysterious disappearance of Jamie's forehead the past two years. Jamie told SST in an exclusive interview, "Rogaine with Monoxidil just wasn't working for me. Duam Duam and Dr. Gimhae saved my career man. Sometimes you have to do what you gotta do to stay on top of your game as a Black man in Hollywood. You know what I'm sayin'? Not all brothers can sport the bald look like Boris Kodjoe and Samuel Jackson. My problem was that damn jheri curl from the ??80s. It just messed my nappy roots slam up. In California and Texas, too many brothers my age continue to suffer from what Dr. Gimhae calls the Lye Fried Syndrome. It's just a crying shame, man. I'm thinking about filing a class action lawsuit on the inventors (Jheri Redding) and manufacturers of that shit. It almost ruined by career. I was seriously thinkg about trying to find work in Bollywood." But, they blacklisted me. They said I was a dhalit. But, they were really just scared I'd make a booty call and get karma sutra lessons from an Indian actress off camera. Ever since the movie Any Given Sunday, they think all black men are hung like horses. It ain't fair I tell you. Bollywood really has some serious acting. But I'll take Hollywood and high-yellow women any day."

 

Foxx had signed a multi-million dollar contract to endorse Rogaine with Monoxidil. Reefa Niger, corporate diversity representative and spokesperson for Pfizer, the makers of Rogaine told SST in January, "Jamie was a perfect fit for our new Urban Marketing Campaign. We've experienced decreasing sales growth among balding white men. We see the black community as an underserved market. Black men suffer from hair loss at similar rates to white males. But, many feel this product is designed for whites. We want to change this thinking. Samuel Jackson was our first choice. However, after rocking a baldee in Shaft and more recently Coach Carter, he cut himself out of the deal. No pun intended."

 

SST's repeated attempts to get a response from Niger on this new revelation were unsuccessful at press time. The Duam Duam Corporation plans to roll out its Hair Matrix program as early as 2007 going head to head with the Hair Club for Men. Jamie will be the pitchman for its Afro-Matrix campaign.