Bill - Seemiller Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Honestly, I couldn't help but flare up in anger reading this woman's complaints. But "Abby's" response in the end makes the read all worthwhile http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/columnists/advic...umn,0,5408769.column But isn't this what all us men (and women) losing our hair fear? Thankfully not all women think like the way the woman in the articles does. Thoughts? Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member youngsuccess Posted May 22, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 22, 2008 Yeah, good luck to her; she has GREAT odds of meeting a guy who will never experience any degree of hair loss. As if that were the sole criterion she uses to determine the best parter for her... what a miserable person. The only forseeable problem in their future is the possibility that he may lose more hair? I can understand why a woman may not be initially attracted to a guy with thin hair; falling in love with someone and THEN complaining about it is entirely different. Her argument is basically this: "In time, I fear his looks may deteriorate". HA HA HA HA HA HA. Someone forgot to tell her that women age as well. Despite a few guys here and there who are seemingly proud of being assholes, you don't usually see committed men leaving their girlfriends/wives over wrinkles and cellulite. Pathetic. You're right though- the response she received probably made her feel like the biggest piece of shit alive. The fact that she claims to be attracted to him currently but is worrying about what he will look like in the future suggests that she is just searching for a reason to doubt the relationship anyway. She is probably just some chickenhead with no self awareness. The sad thing is that there are probably a lot of balding guys who are so into their own self loathing that they'll be like, "No... she has a right to feel that way. I know I'm not attractive anymore blah blah". It's natural to feel insecure, but rarely do other people care as much as you do about your perceived flaws. So when someone else actually has a problem with YOUR hairloss, it's time to move on. ------- All opinions are my own and my advice should not constitute as medical advice. View my My Hair Loss Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member uncjim Posted May 22, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 22, 2008 Sounds like Elaine from Seinfeld. I can see George inspecting her boyfriend (the poor guy and Elaine fear he's loosing his hair after letting it grow out) under a lamp and magnifying glass. George tells him that he probably has 6 months left. He asks George "what should I do". George's response, "Live dammit..LIVE!" If memory serves, she dumps the guy. Classic stuff. These ladies are out there for sure and they'll break your heart every time. The best scenario is to create some memories (if ya know what I mean) and move on. "Temples 'n Crowns Forever" Uncjim's Hair Loss WebLog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member dabuski Posted May 22, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 22, 2008 I think age difference here has something to do with it also. Shes probably still hung up on looks etc,as most young folk are. Still it does not say much for her feelings for this poor guy. He would be better of trading her in for someone his own age who's had a life and doesn't give a monkeys whats on his head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member Here I Grow Again Posted May 22, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 22, 2008 What a shame, so shallow but men are guilty of this as well. I'm generalizing- not all men nor women are that shallow. Even still, looks fade, on all sides- Hair, weight, skin, etc. It's a shame when people base their long term goals on these points because they are guaranteed- to change that is. HIGA 2400 Grafts with Dr. Epstein 11/8/06 Nizoral 3X/week Rogaine foam 2x/day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Al - Moderator Posted May 29, 2008 Moderators Share Posted May 29, 2008 What is so wrong with what she is saying? All of us here are trying to get our hair back because we don't feel we look good enough without hair. So why is it so bad if a young woman says what we already say about ourselves? Almost every single guy under 30 (and many older than that I'm sure) who is here trying to find ways to get their hair back is doing it at least partly so he can date younger, hotter, better looking women. So we are just as shallow as she is. Al Forum Moderator (formerly BeHappy) I am a forum moderator for hairrestorationnetwork.com. I am not a Dr. and I do not work for any particular Dr. My opinions are my own and may not reflect the opinions of other moderators or the owner of this site. I am also a hair transplant patient and repair patient. You can view some of my repair journey here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill - Seemiller Posted May 29, 2008 Author Share Posted May 29, 2008 In my opinion, we all like what we like and are attracted to what we are attracted to. There is nothing wrong with the fact that she prefers her boyfriend to have a full head of hair. But falling out of love with someone over something physicial when we are all going to rot and decay as the years go by (with hair or not) is trivial and not what being in love is about. Physical attraction is important, but who we are is vastly more important and that is what real love is about. So what she is really saying is, I'm infatuated with my boyfriend for his looks and feel that my infatuation will disappear with his hair. So be it. But this girl doesn't understand what love is about. Of course, this is all just my opinion on the matter. Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member its752 Posted May 29, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 29, 2008 There's a good chance that this girl doesn't know for sure how she may react to her boy friend losing his hair more. People often say one thing, and when you ask them later about it turns out they've done something entirely different. Let real love pop up and slap her in the face, and she might be writng "Dear Abby" back. BeHappy: You wrote the same thing I was thinking exactly when I read her story, that we like ourselves less when were going through hair loss and nobody complains. Thank god for hair transplantation today!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member youngsuccess Posted May 30, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 30, 2008 The bottom line is this: many of us have supportive girlfriends or wives who honestly don't care if we have hair or not; it's about how we feel, not about how THEY feel. If this guy empowers his girlfriend's shallow outlook on their relationship and stresses over it, he is in for trouble. I wouldn't be surprised if this gets to the point when she makes an ultimatum. The poor souls who start to believe they are worthless to other people without their hair are the ones who wind up making rash decisions and fucking their entire lives up over it. This guy deserves better. Despite the fact that she tries justifying her feelings, deep down the girl knows she is a snob, which most likely explains why she would have to resort to advice from a complete stranger online than discuss the matter with someone close to her. Either that, or all of her friends and family already told her she is a bitch, and her last resort was to write to Abby, who essentially told her the same thing. She got OWNED!!! ------- All opinions are my own and my advice should not constitute as medical advice. View my My Hair Loss Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member HairDew Posted May 30, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted May 30, 2008 I honestly think its the AGE FACTOR. It is NOT love (infatuation at best). But you know what? Time will come when she starts to sag, her boobs will sag down to her knees etc.... All I can say is "The power of Pu$$y" (sorry for analogy) but it is TRUE. The guy knew what he was getting into before hand. Having 11 years difference is HUGE IMHO. I'm not saying that true relationships with this age difference don't happen but it is clearly NOT the case here. I have to agree with BeHappy here, our problem with baldness is partially (for some solely) sex related. While we all hope that people will love our INNER world, the reality is; in order for ANYONE to like your inner world, they first have to be physically attracted to you. Otherwise they won't give themselves a chance to like you. Probably harsh but its a reality in most cases. There are exceptions though. Just my $0.02 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member djdennis Posted June 9, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 9, 2008 In Reality!!! IM GOINGTO SWITCH THE SCENERIO!!! I have a very good friend who has been dating this lady for 6 years. She was pretty for alot of Years. She had a baby with my buddy and she packed on the pounds. She hated to work out and my buddy is in awesome shape as he hits the gym 6 times per week and is just plain cut. Im sure his girl is having a great time. But my buddy is very depressed and does not want to sleep with her because its not like it used to be. Always improve yourself if you can. If this girl wants her man to have an ht she should talk to him and tell him that she likes hair.. Guys we like hair and thats why we are here on this site. So lets stop bashing the girl and get a little real. She did not say she was going to leave him, just that it bothered her. Guys if your girl lost her front tooth and did nothing about it. What would you do??? lol My Hair Loss WebLog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member HairDew Posted June 9, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 9, 2008 Dennis, it all starts with "bothering" Then, divorce, courts, money dividing, depression, stress, loosing more hair Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member PLEASE GROW PLEASE Posted June 9, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 9, 2008 Guys if your girl lost her front tooth and did nothing about it. What would you do??? Beg her to pull the rest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill - Seemiller Posted June 10, 2008 Author Share Posted June 10, 2008 I think the difference here is love verses lust. Maybe I wouldn't like it if my wife lost her front teeth nor if she gained weight. But I wouldn't leave her over it nor would I fall out of love with her. One thing we have to remember here is that certain things are normal. Going bald, like it or not, is normal for many, and so is weight gain while being pregnant or after pregnancy. What about aging? The bottom line is NOBODY will stay attractive forever. If we base our love for another on looks to the point that we will leave them if they lose them, everybody would be single. I have yet to meet one physicailly attractive 80 year old. But one day (if my wife and I survive long enough), we will both be 80 and ugly, but love each other very much None of this is to argue that we shouldn't work hard to look the best we can - but what defined love over lust is that we actually care about the person underneat the surface. Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member dabuski Posted June 10, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 10, 2008 Well put Bill. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member PLEASE GROW PLEASE Posted June 11, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 11, 2008 The bottom line is NOBODY will stay attractive forever Unless your an almost 70 Raquel http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/gallery/0,22056,5...27-5010141-4,00.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member dabuski Posted June 11, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 11, 2008 Say no more mate. Will never forget the fist time i saw One Million years BC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member djdennis Posted June 12, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted June 12, 2008 Very Good point Bill!!! I agree with you a 100%, my only question is the girl is very young compared to her guy. I think over or around 10 years. She is just immature and has not experienced life. My Hair Loss WebLog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regular Member Tragedy86 Posted July 7, 2008 Regular Member Share Posted July 7, 2008 i cant find the story..the link sends me to the site but its all just a list of new stories? old link? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill - Seemiller Posted July 7, 2008 Author Share Posted July 7, 2008 Tragedy, Sadly, it looks like they removed the article. I have no idea why they would do this, but I'm not finding it on Google anymore either. Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Member Smoothy Posted July 11, 2008 Senior Member Share Posted July 11, 2008 Many women hairloss is hormonal, most women after childbirth experience HL and some with hormonal chances w/age and birthcontrol pills. One might look at a lower dosage of birthcontrol pills if they take them, get protein treatment once 6 weeks from salon, try Rogain foam in spot areas, and make sure you take your Omega vitamins-- females need them more than males. SMOOTHY Propecia/Rogain xtra MSM/Saw Palmetto Nioxin Zrii Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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