INeedHelp

OK, I'm on meds now and feeling a lot better. Although I still have a lot of morbid thoughts about "hair islands" many years from now as a sick old man. I didn't have body dysmorphic disorder going into this. I was just a cluelessly naive man having a manic episode. Only after the transplant and its shock loss did I start having body dysmorphic feelings. As I said before, my hair loss wasn't even noticeable before. Now I also fear that I will look weird and unnatural with the transplant. All and all I am feeling better and thank you all so much for putting up with my crazy bullshit. One quick question, who can I talk to about performing a miniaturization test? Can any dermatologist perform this? I just want the peace of mind of knowing where my future male pattern is heading and how to prepare for it from an honest ethical person who isn't trying to sell me more transplants. Thanks all.

I believe that this hair line is gong to be too low on my forehead. This whole entire experience has been traumatic, terrifying, and crippling. The whole reason I did this is because I associated it with self improvement and now I am largely unable to function! I may very well wind up losing my job over this! I am going to be disfigured! You need to understand, I don't have body dysmorphic disorder. It was all just a whimsical desire to improve myself. I can't believe I put no thought into this at all! I just want my temples back so I can go on living my life and put this whole horrifying experience behind me! I do not want to look like a freak, I just want to age normally! I wish I had spoken to a counselor before doing this! I had a perfect head of hair, and now I might have to shave it all off and expose my scar!

Ok I'm fairly certain that when these hairs grow in I'm going to look bad. There is absolutely nothing wrong with my academic temples. I live in south carolina, and I'm curios if there are any honest, trustworthy doctors near by who could give me ethical advice on both my future hair loss pattern as well as what I can do to avoid looking like a freak. I'm sorry but I just don't trust these doctors. With drugs and therapy, I feel as though I can think more clearly now. Thank you everyone

Thank you. With group therapy I am feeling alot better. I don't want to take meds if I don't have too but I can't stop crying. I realize that this isn't the end and I'm far from suicidal, but oh man have I fucked up this time! I got a hair transplant that I didn't even need! I was just an early norwood 2 with still mostly thick hair. With my hair combed the right way it didn't even look like I had any hair loss at all! I was just losing hair on the temples and it was unnoticeable to other people! Ethical people would not have accepted me as a patient, they would have sent me to psychological counseling in stead! You have no idea how stabbing this pain is too me! I will be scared by this for the rest of my life, and the experience has changed me in so many ways! While I will never go bald, it is a certainty that my hair line will retreat from where it is now and I simply do not want the hair transplant "V" showing. I have slightly wavy blond hair which I think should help cover that up. So is it even possible to have the transplant hairs removed from a hair line without damaging the native hairs? Does anyone know anything about this? I realize it is still early and all, but like I said, I just want to look normal when I'm older. I'm not obsessing on this nearly as much as I was in the beginning, but I'm still deeply depressed over this whole thing. Many thanks for the support you guys have done so much.

I had it done the day after thanksgiving. Like I said I put no research or thought into this what so ever. It was an impulsive thing. I regretted doing it literally a few days after having done it when I came down from my manic phase. I believe that it will prove to be the biggest regret of my life. That's why I'm wondering if its impossible to reverse FUE transplanted graphs from a hair line? My biggest wish is to simply grow old normally, without having to do "transplant repair" ever couple years. As I said before, I'm finally at that time in my life when I'm feeling comfortable around women, what if this thing looks like shit? Its right in my hair line, so how could I possibly get rid of it without damaging my native hair? I realize I sound crazy right now, and thats because I am. I'm in a program for mental heath and taking a week or two off work. The anxiety is killing me! I think they made the hair line too low anyway! This thing will not be age appropriate in 10 or 20 years!

I guess I should check my hair for miniaturization, that is to see where my future hair loss is heading. If I have nothing to worry about then I'll leave it. If I feel I only have a few years until its obsolete so to speak, I'll just get rid of it now and save myself the embarrassment. I have anxiety issues and this whole thing about deciding my future path is playing upon that.

Thank you everyone for being so kind. As I mentioned before. I experienced a great deal of shock loss from my frontal hair line after this procedure. I think I look about 5 to 10 years older, which ironically enough has drawn female attention. I always have had a very youthful look so maybe in a way looking a bit older isn't such a bad thing. I was always a pretty boy with my flowing blond hair, when I saw a small bald spot forming on my left temple I panicked. Because of my state of mind I went out and had transplants and regretted it immensely within a week of doing it. In all honestly, and don't take this the wrong way. I would much rather become an advanced Norwood and look natural than look like a guy with a shitty hair transplant! In the end, even after a year of waiting for it to mature, I believe this procedure will have only cost me hairs. You know those thinning hairs that you have been painstakingly nourishing with minoxidil, only to see them destroyed by the transplant? In the end, and this might be a year from now or ten years, I fully believe I will be lasering this shit off to regain the appearance of normality. The end result, less hair in the back, and less hair in the front. I have only accelerated my natural hair loss. I feel as if my pride and vanity was my undoing because I had a real nice head of hair before this. Its like a knife stabbing into me. I can't stop thinking about it. I dream about it, and I believe the stress is only making more hairs fall out. Ironically enough, if I get put on lithium next week, one of its side effects is further hair loss! The only positive to come out of this is that from now on I will not be so self absorbed. Now I can focus on loving other people. I no longer "check myself out" in the mirror like I used to like a vain narcissist. Now I am repulsed by myself. I need a woman in my life because I don't want to die alone! But if I come out of this looking like a freak, no chance for that to happen. This is my mental state right now. I just want to age naturally, Hair transplants never age well!

I'm feeling a little better now, and trying to be more positive about the future. Thanks everyone for putting up with me. I appreciate your support.

I can't take propecia, do what other options do I have? I'm not having additional transplants! I want out!

Ok so I've been diagnosed with bipolar by my general practitioner. I have to take leave from work and go to treatment. My hair is really starting to fall out now. I thought the shedding phase was over? I'm really REALLY kicking myself for doing this. I HATE that I have done this! someone please tell me that its possible to remove 1225 graphs from your frontal hair line without eradicating the native hair? Is this something that can be done? I want out of this! The stress and anxiety is killing me. I keep seeing visions of myself as a old man with "islands" of hair where hair shouldn't be! What can I do?

Bosley had no idea I was psychologically sick because at that time neither did I. I felt invincible and was picking out minor "imperfections" in my existing hair line. It was an obsession. I'm checking myself into the hospital after I speak to my general practitioner today. I can't eat or sleep and I keep throwing up. I couldn't go to work today. I keep crying uncontrollably. Please tell me this is not permanent shock loss? I know the miniature hairs don't come back but this was like my entire hair line. I didn't even have a forelock prior to this.

For me, its the fact that I ruined a good thing, that bothers me the most. That's what is most difficult to deal with psychologically. Unlike most people on this forum this had nothing to do with baldness insecurity and more to do with insane psychotic narcissism. There really wasn't any way I would benefit from the procedure cosmetically, it was all in my head. I looked great the way I was. I have no desire to undergo any further transplants. I think they are just too risky and I like the hair I have left on the back of my head. I can't believe I spent 8000 dollars to mutilate a perfectly good head of hair. That's what stabs at me the most and I have no one to blame but myself. My own vanity did me in. I'm only about 2 months in so I don't know how this is going to turn out in the end. I just hope my native hair grows back so I can work on having the transplanted hairs removed. I don't want to risk f**king things up even more. I just want to salvage what I have left and make the most of it. I want to find a woman who can love me. This mistake will haunt me for the rest of my life I think. Why is the transplant industry completely unregulated? How was I ever accepted as candidate for this surgery? It could have only harmed me. I don't feel like being around people. I can't focus on my job at work. I lost all my ambitions out of this. It killed apart of me. I don't know exactly how I'm going to pick up the pieces after this. I'm not the type to kill himself but this has been a very painful experience that will be very hard to fully recover from.

It has recently been suggested to me by a therapist that I more than likely have bi-polar disorder. Over these last few months I became increasingly obsessed with my hair. I couldn't stop looking at it in mirrors and found myself constantly touching it. I was having lots of obsessive repeating thoughts at this time. I would apply minoxidil religiously every day and evening, and use hair loss shampoos. Anyway I'm 29 and I had what was an early Norwood 2 "maturing" hairline, but otherwise do not suffer from hair loss of any kind. I had no VISIBLE hair loss aside from a slight spot on my left temple where I part my hair. However, in my own mind I saw myself as balding. Baldness does not run in my family, My father and his father both never lost any hair. On my mother's side, both my uncle and grandfather had receding hair lines on their temples but never went bald. I became increasingly manic, and was awarded a speeding ticket for driving 98 miles an hour on my way to Bosley where I signed up for a hair transplant immediately. I can't say I was "conned" by the salesman because I barely spoke to him. I did no research and knew next to nothing about hair transplants. Any way I had the procedure carried out by Angela Phipps. I can't blame her for this because she seemed off put and even asked me if this was what I really wanted and I said "yes." I believe I was living in a disassociated state at this time. I had 1225 graphs implanted into my existing hair line which subsequently fell out from shock loss. This was traumatic for me because I actually had good hair. The idea that I killed my native hair is very depressing to me. Once the procedure was over I was overcome with euphoria and called up my parents to tell them I loved them while crying. However once I began looking up hair transplantation online I realized I had made a terrible mistake and fell into a deep traumatic depression. I don't think they are a smart idea unless you are older. I feel as if a knife has been stabbed into me and its no one's fault but my own. I fully believe that this was the single wost mistake of my life. Not only financially, but the notion that I have ruined my natural good looks hurts me deeply. I was going through a period of self improvement in my life and the hair transplants played into that I suppose. Its a shame because I was finally starting to feel confident with women. Just how bad and obvious is this thing going to look when it matures?? How am I going to be judged by others? Will I be made fun of? I'm actually hoping the procedure was a failure right now. By the way, I can't take propecia due to its side effects and I know I am destined to recede slightly further although I'll never bald. If I had to sum up the emotions I'm feeling right now they would be: Shame, guilt, humiliation, loss, and regret. I feel like I"m disfigured in a way, although no one else can notice any difference. I don't like how the hair on the back of my head feels flat. It used to blow in the wind. The funny thing is, I now no longer care about hair loss, but am in effect married to it because I don't wish for my hair line (primarily my temples) to recede past the transplants although I should have a good decade at least before that happens. What exactly are my options for undoing this and returning to my natural state, in so far as this is possible? Surely there is a cosmetic surgeon who would be willing to return the graphs? I just want to grow old naturally without the stress of keeping up with a receding hair line. I don't want "islands" of hair on my head as an old man. At any rate, I'll be speaking to a psychiatric doctor to get on medication, and a dermatologist to see just what I've done to myself. I hope everyone here is having a good day.